


Mentally Unstable Teens Versus Humanity

by GrumpyMoony



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Eating Disorders, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, LGBTQ Character of Color, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Child Abuse, Polyamory, Slow Burn, Texting, Therapy, text fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-09-23 18:17:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 20,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9670430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrumpyMoony/pseuds/GrumpyMoony
Summary: Remus finds a lost notebook and texts the phone number written on the first page, hoping to help their owner to get it backA story about mental health, trust and of course, love.





	1. just one more crazy teen

**Author's Note:**

> i started another fic even though i haven't finished my other one ! yay !
> 
> all the triggers warnings are in the tags and they should be present all along this work, but if they are discussed more deeply i will put a warning at the beginning of the chapter
> 
> i haven't experience any of these situations first hand and there is only so much you can learn via researches, so if i write anything offensive please let me know and i'll fix it asap !
> 
> and since i don't want anyone to be waiting in vain, there won't be any smut sorry
> 
> remus is italics, sirius is bold
> 
> have a good read !

February the 14th 

 

_[17:47] Er, hello ? I’m sorry if i’m bothering you, but i found a notebook with this phone number on it in a therapist's waiting room, is it yours ?_

 

**[17:53] hey! thanks mate, i’ve been looking for it for hours ! i have literally no idea how it fell out of my bag tho o_O**

 

_[17:54] Do I just leave it to the therapist for you to get ? Or do you not plan to get back ?_

 

_[17:54] Sorry that was intrusive_

 

**[17:55] dont worry it wasn’t !**

 

**[17:55] i’m going back to him next week so you can just do that, if you’re still here**

 

_[17:55] My appointment is in 5 minutes, I can totally do that_

 

**[17:56] oh you’re a patient too then ?**

 

_[17:56] Like most people in a therapist’s waiting room, yes_

 

**[17:57] haha idk you could have been cleaning staff**

 

_[17:57] Sorry to disappoint, but I’m just one more crazy teen_

 

**[17:58] lets create a club then!**

 

**[17:58] mentally unstable teens versus humanity**

 

_[17:59] We would definitely lose_

 

**[17:59] im making this an actual thing omg**

 

_[18:00] Whatever makes you happy, I guess. Therapy time for me, bye !_

 

**[18:01] bye!**

 

* * *

 

**[20:24] how was therapy ?**

 

_[20:25] ?_

 

_[20:25] Pretty okay ?_

 

**[20:26] why the interrogation mark ?**

 

_[20:26] Well_

 

_[20:27] I gave your notebook to Dr. Johnson, I supposed we didn’t need to interact anymore ?_

 

**[20:27] are you not into making friends?**

 

_[20:27] I am_

 

_[20:28] But I didn't exactly see this short text exchange as a friend-making opportunity_

 

**[20:29] gotta take changes in life to move forward you know**

 

**[20:29] and i must take care of the mentally unstable teens team in order to defeat humanity, remember ?**

 

_[20:30] You're too extroverted for your own good but whatever_

 

_[20:30] Who made you the captain of our team against humanity ?_

 

**[20:31] i was the most obvious choice !**

 

_[20:31] Do you have any argument to back out this theory or… ?_

 

**[20:32] i have my good looks, my tactical skills and my brains**

 

_[20:32] Sure_

 

**[20:33] you dont believe me ???**

 

_[20:33] I have absolutely no proof of any of these affirmations_

 

**[20:33] okay then**

 

**[20:34] whales and hippos are actually rather close cousins**

 

**[20:34] see i’m clever !**

 

_[20:35] That’s not intellect, that’s knowledge_

 

**[20:36] oh well maybe you should be the team capt then !**

 

_[20:37] Okay sorry wait a second my boyfriend is calling me, I’ll be right back_

 

**[20:37] a bf? i wanna hear the details !**

 

_[20:56] Sorry it was longer than expected_

 

**[20:57] no problem :)**

 

_[20:58] Anyway I have some work to do so bye_

 

**[21:00] poor you. good luck with those!**

 

* * *

 

February the 15th 

 

**[9:03] i didnt even ask for your pronouns yet, dear new texting friend**

 

_[9:05] Aren’t you supposed to be in class ? Or are you home schooled or something ?_

 

**[9:05] im too punk rock for school rules. aren’t YOU supposed to be in class ?**

 

_[9:06] History class is boring so I’m reading on my phone_

 

_[9:06] He/Him, you ?_

 

**[9:07] they/them**

 

**[9:07] history is boring then? i would have thought you were a nerd, seeing how you never use abbrev and put caps and stuffs**

 

_[9:08] I am a nerd, therefore already know all there is to know about history, therefore am bored_

 

**[9:08] wow**

 

**[9:09] i am in chemistry btw, and trying to ignore our teacher**

 

_[9:09] What’s wrong with them ? Besides the fact he chose the worst subject ever ?_

 

**[9:10] he always brags about all the student he had who became famous and/or rich, including my father**

 

_[9:10] Are you too punk rock to admit you have parents too ?_

 

**[9:11] nope, but my family ( or rather ex-family ) was a bunch of homophobic abusive assholes and i try to avoid thinking about them :)))**

 

_[9:11] I’m sorry_

 

**[9:11] you didnt know**

 

**[9:12] anyway help me to think about smthg else than class**

 

_[9:12] Like what ?_

 

**[9:12] idk**

 

**[9:13] tell me things about yourself?**

 

_[9:13] Not much to say_

 

_[9:15] I’m 16, no siblings, no pets, one boyfriend, I usually tell people I_ _read a lot but I actually don't do it as much as before, I have no particular passion or talent or whatever, I watch Friends a lot, and I am a nerd but you already knew that_

 

_[9:15] You ?_

 

**[9:16] 17, two brothers, one biological and the other adoptive, no pets, no datemate, i draw stuffs, i’m not the biggest fan of friends and i am punk rock**

 

**[9:16] tell me about the boyfriend ?**

 

_[9:17] He listens to heavy metal?_

 

**[9:17] oh my god metal is so cool**

 

**[9:17] y’know, classic rock is the best but metal is not far behind**

 

_[9:18] He would kill me if I said something was better than metal_

 

**[9:19] it appears your bf and i entered a war**

 

_[9:19] Anyway you mentioned an adoptive sibling ?_

 

**[9:20] yessss it’s my best friend james. we met when we were 11 and we started to pull pranks together, and now we are every teacher’s worst nightmare**

 

_[9:21] Sounds cool, what kind of pranks?_

 

**[9:21] well now they're just shit to mess with people's head like changing the school's computer's background as shrek fanart**

 

[9:21] _Was that an actual thing???_

 

**[9:22] it was. but they evolved a lot since we began**

 

_[9:22] What do you mean?_

 

**[9:22] they weren't always this creative**

 

**[9:23] but you know we were kids**

 

_[9:24] You sound like super suspicious but sure_

 

**[9:25] sorry we aren't friends enough to unlock that part of my backstory**

 

_[9:25] I'll wait forward to it_

 

**[9:26] some of our pranks are more targeted at that one dude to get revenge for when he's an asshole to us**

 

**[9:26] he's like a bigot in every single way**

 

_[9:27] Fair enough, make him pay_

 

_[9:28] So besides James and Lily do you have any other friend ?_

 

**[9:28] i hang out with my biological bro regulus a lot, and there is marlene who’s my platonic soulmate and her girlfriend dorcas**

 

**[9:28] you?**

 

**[9:32] are u there?**

 

_[9:35] sorry, teacher was looking at me_

 

**[9:36] you ought to work on your sneaking around skills if you want to help the mentally unstable teens team to defeat humanity**

 

**[9:36] but we were talking about your friends**

 

_[9:37] right_

 

_[9:38] i used to be pretty close to that guy named peter but we have talked less recently_

 

**[9:38] was he a close friend?**

 

_[9:39] yeah_

 

_[9:40] he was the funniest person i know_

 

**[9:40] you should talk to him again then!**

 

_[9:41] idk_

 

_[9:41] i’ll think about it_

 

**[9:42] good**

 

**[9:43] !!!!**

 

**[9:43] i still dont know your name !**

 

_[9:44] Oh right_

 

_[9:44] But I don’t know yours either_

 

**[9:45] sirius**

 

_[9:46] Like the star ?_

 

**[9:46] are you into astronomy ?**

 

_[9:47] My boyfriend is_

 

**[9:47] oooh, he’s cooler than i thought**

 

**[9:50] so your name would be ?**

 

_[9:51] Yes sorry_

 

_[9:51] I’m Remus_

 

**[9:52] wow our names are equally weird**

 

**[9:52] we’re like soulmates**

 

_[9:53] my next class is starting soon gotta go_

  
**[9:53] bye remus !**


	2. Boyfriend Day, Phone Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drama and drinking games happen, and Sirius does not have a crush on Remus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright everyone ! wow two updates the same day i'm on fire!
> 
> tw : abusive relationship ( not explicitely pointed out but still present )

February the 16th

 

**[11:02] hey, what’s up?**

 

**[11:32] youre in a not boring class then?**

 

**[11:33] guess i’ll try again during lunck break**

 

**[12:11] hey, what’s up?**

 

**[12:15] i’m good btw**

 

**[12:18] i have chemistry again this afternoon, i’m trying to find an excuse not to go**

 

**[12:24] james is forcing me to go or he will be alone**

 

**[12:25] cant wait**

 

**[12:34] he is referring to me spamming you as “pathetic”, remus come and defend my honor**

 

**[12:37] guess i should really stop spamming you**

 

**[12:42] bye remus**

 

_[19:03] Wow 11 messages you’re really clingy_

 

**[19:03] remus you have returned!**

 

**[19:04] where were you?**

 

_[19:05] Boyfriend day, phone away_

 

**[19:05] bf day???**

 

**[19:06] werent you supposed to be in class??**

 

_[19:06] Please stop acting like my mother_

 

_[19:07] Due to some mental health reasons, I am allowed to skip school whenever I want_

 

**[19:07] and youre using this right to go and visit your bf? and here i thought you were a goodie two shoes**

 

**[19:08] and how did he skip class? does he have special rights too?**

 

_[19:09] You’re really curious about all of this_

 

_[19:10] It’s not like we were the only people to skip class_

 

_[19:11] And my boyfriend isn’t going to school anymore_

 

**[19:11] the lucky man**

 

**[19:12] wait how old is he?**

 

_[19:12] 21_

 

_[19:13] Should I be worried about your obsession about him or… ?_

 

**[19:15] nah, just curious**

 

**[19:16] anyway, how was your day then?**

 

_[19:16] Great, yours ?_

 

**[19:17] urgh, i had to sit for two hours of chemistry and listen to some non sense about atoms or something**

 

_[19:17] Chemistry is the worst_

 

_[19:18] I get that it’s important to fight ignorance and cure diseases and stuffs like that, but still_

 

**[19:18] fighting ignorance** **?**

 

**[19:19] youre a social justice warrior?**

 

_[19:20] I always thought the word ‘warrior’ was a bit exaggerated but yes ig_

 

**[19:20] that’s great man!**

 

**[19:21] im one too!**

 

**[19:22] we really are soulmates!**

 

_[19:23] Yeah, er, about that_

 

_[19:23] Could you please not call me your soulmate or things like that ?_

 

_[19:24] I know it’s a joke but still_

 

**[19:25] no problem i understand!**

 

**[19:26] sorry im extremely clingy and affectionate**

 

**[19:26] i cuddle with all of my friends**

 

**[19:27] once i cuddled james in class for half an hour before the teacher said anything**

 

_[19:27] Sounds nice_

 

**[19:28] isn’t your bf providing your daily dose of cuddle?**

 

**[19:28] did you two spend an entire day together without cuddling?**

 

_[19:29] We’re not exactly the cuddling type_

 

_[19:30] Anyway_

 

_[19:31] What are you listening to ?_

 

**[19:32] bohemian rhapsody. if i wear headphones, chances are im listening to it.**

 

_[19:33] Can’t blame you for this_

 

**[19:33] you ?**

 

_[19:34] Paramore - Last Hope_

 

**[19:35] are you listening to it  just because hayley williams is hot? ;)**

 

_[19:35] Lol no_

 

_[19:36] I’m ace_

 

**[19:36] oh sorry**

 

**[19:37] are you listening to it just because her hair is perfect?**

 

_[19:38] I just like the music_

 

_[19:38] Nothing to do with her appearance_

 

**[19:39] if you say so**

 

_[19:40] It’s true !_

 

**[19:41] hey i believe you**

 

**[19:42] no need to get defensive**

 

_[19:42] Sorry_

 

**[19:43] no need to apologize either**

 

_[19:44] Yeah_

 

**[19:45] mum is making dinner and from the smell i think she’s making my favorite meal!**

 

_[19:45] Mum ?_

 

_[19:46] If it’s not intrusive, are you talking about the biological abusive mother ?_

 

**[19:47] no, my real mum**

 

**[19:47] james’s mother**

 

**[19:48] they took me in when i ran away from home**

 

_[19:48] That’s_

 

_[19:49] That was so nice of them_

 

**[19:49] trust me i know**

 

 **[19:50] anyway the point of all this was that i’m eating** **baingan bharta tonight!**

 

**[19:50] it’s an indian meal made with eggplants that you eat with flatbread**

 

**[19:51] a bit spicy**

 

**[19:52] and mum makes it just perfectly**

 

**[19:53] what’s your favorite food ?**

 

_[19:56] I like chocolate_

 

**[19:57] what kind of chocolate?**

 

_[19:57] All kinds_

 

**[19:58] not picky?**

 

_[20:00] Not really_

 

_[20:00] Nothing planned tonight ?_

 

**[20:01] marathoning supernatural with james, complaining about queerbaiting, not doing my homeworks**

 

_[20:02] I stopped Supernatural and Sherlock because of it_

 

**[20:02] oh so mister remus is judging my tv shows taste bc of queerbaiting but watches friends?**

 

_[20:03] I’m not judging you, I’m judging the shows_

 

_[20:03] I judge Friends too_

 

_[20:04] But it’s just too funny_

 

**[20:05] trust me i know the feeling**

 

**[20:06] dinner is ready, ttyl !**

 

_[20:06] Enjoy_

 

* * *

 

**[20:54] i enjoyed**

 

**[21:05] remus?**

 

_[21:16] Sorry, call from the boyfriend again_

 

**[21:17] you’ve just spent the entire day together!**

 

**[21:17] and i’m the clingy one?**

 

_[21:18] Yeah well we like to talk together you know ?_

 

_[21:19] Since we’re a couple and stuffs_

 

**[21:20] and what new did you have to say to each other???**

 

**[21:21] “i’ve listened to paramore and talked to the captain of the mentally unstable teens team”**

 

**[21:22] not a lot to say**

 

_[21:23] We were discussing our next day together_

 

**[21:24] oh that i can understand**

 

**[21:24] me and james do that too you know?**

 

**[21:25] days just the two of us**

 

**[21:26] when he has time outside of dating of course**

 

_[21:27] He has a lot of people lining up to date him ?_

 

**[21:28] ha not at all but he has two datemates so twice the time necessary**

 

_[21:29] Oh, one boyfriend already takes all my time, can’t imagine two_

 

**[21:30] they’re very cute. he’s with lily and regulus actually**

 

_[21:31] He’s with your brother ?_

 

**[21:32] yeah i was a bit shocked too**

 

**[21:32] especially since i never knew lily and him were open**

 

_[21:33] Are they a triad, or is he dating both separately ?_

 

**[21:33] triad**

 

**[21:34] they are adorable bc they are extremely clingy but aren’t out so every time they’re outside they have to refrain themselves from cuddling. once james kissed regulus in a supermarket and then he turned to lily to do the same thing and realized his mistake, so he pointed me and said “see my boyfriend is cuter than yours” and lily and i had to pretend we were dating**

 

_[21:35] That does sound pretty cute_

 

**[21:36] sometimes they make me jealous**

 

**[21:36] i’m fine on my own, you know, but**

 

**[21:37] i never really had a relationship**

 

_[21:38] Relationships don’t always make someone happier you know ?_

 

_[21:38] Dating for the sake of dating isn’t really a good plan_

 

_[21:39] You’ll find someone eventually_

 

_[21:40] And it will happen then_

 

**[21:40] yeah i know**

 

**[21:41] is it how you met your boyfriend?**

 

_[21:41] Kind of_

 

**[21:42] how did you meet then?**

 

_[21:43] Mutual friends_

 

**[21:43] peter?**

 

_[21:44] no_

 

**[21:45] who?**

 

_[21:46] its a long story_

 

**[21:46] please remus?**

 

_[21:47] not tonight, it’s really long_

 

**[21:47] okay**

 

**[21:48] can i get another question then ?**

 

_[21:49] one question against one question_

 

**[21:49] deal**

 

**[21:50] why are you seeing a therapist?**

 

_[21:51] i did not expect that one_

 

_[21:51] But sure_

 

_[21:52] I have anxiety and self confidence issues_

 

_[21:52] But it’s not like the therapy is helping a lot_

 

_[21:53] I’m trying to convince my parents to let me stop it_

 

**[21:53] okay**

 

**[21:54] would you try another therapist then?**

 

_[21:55] I’m not sure. I don’t think so._

 

**[21:58] your question now**

 

_[21:59] nah, i’m keeping it for another time_

 

**[22:00] what ??? we were allowed to do that ???**

 

**[22:00] i wasnt warned!!!**

 

**[22:01] unfair!!!!**

 

**[22:02] I WANT JUSTICE**

 

_[22:02] Lol calm down_

 

**[22:03] i cannot calm down! i’ve been trapped!**

 

_[22:03] Okay here’s an idea_

 

_[22:04] We have three questions each, and you have already used one_

 

_[22:05] You can ask them anytime_

 

**[22:05] hmmm**

 

**[22:06] okay**

 

_[22:07] I’m going to sleep_

 

_[22:07] Have a good marathon !_

 

**[22:08] i will! goodnight!**

 

* * *

 

February the 18th

 

**[0:26] hey hey remus**

 

**[0:26] if your boyfriend listens to so much heavy metal**

 

**[0:27] does he listen to metallicACE ?**

 

**[0:28] or ACEC/DC ?**

 

**[0:29] get it???**

 

**[0:29] BECAUSE YOU’RE ACE**

 

**[0:30] admit it it’s f**

 

**[0:31] Hello Remus this is James. As you may have noticed Sirius is really tired and they need to sleep. I’m sorry if those texts woke you up.**

 

* * *

 

**[17:01] i’ve got the notebook back!**

 

_[17:02] Oh_

 

_[17:02] I’ve forgotten it’s why we started to talk in the first place_

 

**[17:03] i’m calling this destiny**

 

_[17:04] Sure whatever you want_

 

_[17:04] Sirius_

 

**[17:05] yeah?**

 

_[17:06] Metallicace? AceC/DC ?_

 

**[17:07] IM SO SORRY REMUS**

 

_[17:07] I just need to make something very clear_

 

_[17:08] My boyfriend listens to heavy metal and AC/DC is hard rock_

 

**[17:09] is that**

 

**[17:09] okay**

 

**[17:10] noted**

 

_[17:10] Good_

 

_[17:11] Also how did you get drunk while marathoning with James ?_

 

**[17:11] lol that’s the best part**

 

**[17:12] i wasnt drunk**

 

**[17:12] just really tired**

 

_[17:13] Wow_

 

_[17:13] So is there more sleepy texting to expect for my poor soul ?_

 

**[17:14] er**

 

**[17:15] yes?**

 

_[17:15] Oh god what did i get into ?_

 

**[17:16] no take back i’m afraid**

 

_[17:17] Any plans for tonight ?_

 

**[17:18] james and i invited a few friends to play stupid games**

 

**[17:18] i dont know if im more afraid of the truth or dare or the never have i ever**

 

_[17:19] Are you kidding me Never Have I Ever is far worse !_

 

_[17:19] Not only do you admit embarrassing stuffs, but you have to face the fact that you are the only person doing them !_

 

**[17:20] true**

 

**[17:20] do you often play never have i ever?**

 

_[17:21] No, but my few experiences have shown me it is never a good idea_

 

**[17:21] what about you ? any plans for tonight ?**

 

_[17:21] Well it’s a bit complicated_

 

_[17:22] My parents have asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with them_

 

_[17:22] But my boyfriend also wanted me to come and see him and is supposed to send me a text to confirm_

 

_[17:23] So until then I can’t tell my parents yes or no_

 

**[17:25] maybe text him first and ask him?**

 

_[17:30] it’s okay he’s going to text me soon no need to pressure him_

 

**[17:30] remus there’s nothing wrong in texting someone to ask them if your date still stands**

 

_[17:31] i know_

 

**[17:31] then why don’t you ?**

 

_[17:32] it’s complicated okay? he doesn’t like being pressured and he has enough issues without this added. he has his reasons for waiting a bit before to text and they are none of your concern, and telling them to you would be betraying his trust. so just leave it sirius_

 

_[17:33] i have to go anyway_

 

_[17:34] have fun with your friends_

 

* * *

 

**[21:56] remus?**

 

_[21:56] what now_

 

**[21:57] im sorry about earlier. i shouldn’t have pushed the matter. you were right its none of my business**

 

_[22:00] im sorry i overreacted_

 

_[22:00] are we cool?_

 

**[22:01] of course we are!**

 

_[22:01] besides_

 

**[22:04] ...yes?**

 

_[22:11] you were right okay?_

 

_[22:12] he never texted me to confirm the date_

 

_[22:13] so i couldn’t say yes to my parents_

 

_[22:13] and now i’m home alone feeling disgusted with myself_

 

**[22:14] remus**

 

_[22:15] go ahead, tell me “i told you so”_

 

**[22:16] i wont! im sorry this happened to you and i wish i was here to hug you**

 

**[22:16] you should grab ice cream and eat it in front of friends**

 

_[22:17] that would just make everything worse_

 

**[22:17] how did ice cream ever made anything worse ?**

 

_[22:18] it just does_

 

_[22:18] i’ll just marathon friends without any food_

 

**[22:19] okay**

 

**[22:20] wanna play never have i ever?**

 

_[22:21] sure why not_

 

**[22:21] great**

 

**[22:22] never have i ever cried in front of movie**

 

_[22:23] don’t you have a heart ?!_

 

_[22:23] ET? gone with the wind? titanic? schindler’s list?_

 

**[22:24] nope**

 

_[22:25] never have i ever went at school drunk_

 

**[22:26] okay but how do you know that? how do you know i did that?**

 

_[22:26] I’m a psychic_

 

**[22:26] i asked your question to the friends and apparently i am the only one who ever done that???**

 

_[22:27] oh no i forgot you were with your friends_

 

**[22:28] no it’s okay we want you here!**

 

**[22:28] marlene is suggesting we just involve you in the game and i send you the questions and who’s drinking**

 

_[22:29] i don’t want to bother you_

 

**[22:30] you arent i swear !**

 

**[22:30] please remus?**

 

_[22:33] okay_

 

**[22:33] great!**

 

**[22:34] the participants are me, reg, james, lily, marlene, dorcas and frank, he’s a friend of dorcas**

 

**[22:34] and you**

 

**[22:35] from lily : never have i ever injured myself while trying to impress my crush**

 

_[22:36] i’m not drinking_

 

**[22:37] james, frank and dorcas are drinking, but james isn’t a surprise. once he ended up in the hospital for a week because he broke his leg trying to do a “seduction dance” for lily**

 

_[22:38] Oh my god i love that story_

 

**[22:39] from frank : never have i ever questioned my sexuality**

 

**[22:40] THE HETERO BASTARD**

 

_[22:41] I’m drinking. Definitely drinking._

 

_[22:42] Well I’m drinking water but still_

 

**[22:43] EVERYONE IS DRINKING**

 

**[22:44] from dorcas : never have i ever shoplifted**

 

_[22:45] I’m not drinking_

 

**[22:46] im drinking, but i would like a lawyer on this**

 

**[22:47] it was to piss off my biological parents**

 

**[22:48] from marlene : never have i ever had a crush on an adult**

 

_[22:49] my boyfriend is 21_

 

_[22:50] i’m very much drinking_

 

**[22:51] well so is dorcas and WHAT THE HELL REG**

 

_[22:52] Oh, the drama finally begins_

 

**[22:53] HE WONT TELL ME WHO IT WAS**

 

**[22:54] from marlene : never have i ever OH THE LITTLE BITCH**

 

_[22:54] ?_

 

**[22:57] hey this marlene nice to meet you i asked never have i ever had a crush on someone i met via texting and sirius refused to type it to you but they hadn’t drink either so mixed messages a bit?**

 

_[22:57] Oh_

 

**[22:58] REMUS! SHE IS LYING!**

 

**[22:59] i didnt refuse to type it i just wanted to hit her on the head first**

 

**[23:01] i do not have a crush on you or anyone**

 

_[23:02] Yeah, that’s good_

 

**[23:03] anyway obviously no one drank, and it’s your turn**

 

**[23:05] Never have I ever hit on someone who was already in a relationship**

 

_[23:06] i’m not drinking_

 

**[23:07] regulus is of course**

 

**[23:07] and so is frank**

 

**[23:08] MY TURN**

 

**[23:10] never have i ever cheated on my partner**

 

_[23:11] but you don’t have a partner_

 

**[23:11] that’s the trap**

 

**[23:12] looks like no one is drinking, is it lies, is it truth, who knows**

 

_[23:14] what are you guys drinking by the way?_

 

**[23:15] oh just beer**

 

**[23:15] we are more about the game spirit than the alcohol**

 

**[23:17] well i guess it’s regulus’s turn**

 

**[23:18] never have i ever had sex, well that’s a classic**

 

**[23:19] james and lily are drinking**

 

_[23:20] they two had sex but regulus didn’t ?_

 

**[23:21] oh yeah he’s ace too**

 

**[23:22] so no drinking for you then ?**

 

_[23:23] er, actually i’ve had sex. multiple times, actually_

 

**[23:24] oh**

 

_[23:25] you know, some asexuals have sex even without the attraction_

 

**[23:25] okay**

 

**[23:26] ooooh marlene is drinking, dorcas isn’t, interesting**

 

**[23:27] james’s turn : never have i ever sang in the shower**

 

_[23:28] Are you all trying to get me drunk ?_

 

**[23:29] youre drinking water**

 

_[23:30] Shhhhhh_

 

**[23:31] dorcas, lily and me are drinking**

 

_[23:32] We have made the complete circle right ?_

 

**[23:33] well it's your turn**

 

_[23:33] Oh_

 

_[23:34] Never Have I Ever broke someone's bone (arm, leg, whatever)_

 

**[23:35] me and james are drinking**

 

**[23:36] i wont be taking questions**

 

_[23:36] So if the circle really is completed now_

 

_[23:37] Then I think I’m going to sleep. You guys have fun !_

 

**[23:38] goodnight!**

 

_[23:54] and thanks for the cheering up_

  
**[23:55] my pleasure :)**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> does sirius really have a crush? well not really, but he is on the verge of it.  
> was sirius extremely mad at marlene for the question? yes.
> 
> i have to thank my friend tarran for the ace jokes, i swear since i came out this girl have made at least two a day  
> EDIT : my friend ninon absolutely wants me to specify that aced/dc was their own joke and not tarran's, even if i don't really see what there is to be proud of here *long suffering sigh*


	3. I Kinda Like the Nickname?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus finally starts to warm up to Sirius and tells them more about why he sees a therapist, and Doctor Who is discussed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright so i'm pretty happy with this chapter, even if i think the plot is happening way too fast
> 
> more detailed talking about abuse at [17:25] and eating disorder at [17:36], [17:37] and [12:20]  
> from [18:12] on the last day expect a lot of triggering content about these two subjects

February the 19th

**[11:05] hey remus !**

 

**[11:06] last night was fun :)**

 

**[11:08] did not mean to make it sound this way sorry**

 

**[11:12] do you feel better?**

 

**[11:12] you cannot still be sleeping at 11am !**

 

**[11:21] fine, rest**

 

**[12:45] REMUS !**

 

**[12:48] urgh**

 

**[14:23] reeeeemuuuuuuuuuus**

 

**[17:52] R**

 

**[17:52] E**

 

**[17:52] M**

 

**[17:52] U**

 

**[17:33] S**

 

**[19:04] come onnnnnnnn**

 

**[21:17] i warned you, i’m clingy**

 

**[21:18] REMUS**

 

**[21:21] fiiiiiine i’ll stop**

 

**[0:13] goodnight remus**

 

* * *

 

 

February the 20th 

 

**[10:08] remus ?**

 

_[10:09] Hi, sorry about yesterday ! I had another boyfriend day_

 

**[10:09] REMUS!**

 

**[10:10] so… it’s all good for you two ?**

 

_[10:11] Yeah, I’m sorry I bothered you with it the other night, it was nothing_

 

**[10:11] sure?**

 

_[10:12] More than sure. I made a big deal out of nothing_

 

**[10:12] did he explain why he never texted you back ?**

 

_[10:13] Yeah, and he has reasons. It’s complicated. And he insisted on taking me on a great date today to make it up to me, even if there wasn’t really anything to make up for._

 

_[10:14] Oh and you know what ?_

 

**[10:14] what?**

 

_[10:15] He even took me to see the movie my parents planned to show me the night it happened_

 

_[10:16] He’s so sweet_

 

**[10:17] well i’m glad you two are fine**

 

**[10:17] i spent my saturday playing fourth wheel with reg, lily and prongs**

 

_[10:18] Prongs ?_

 

**[10:19] oh that’s james’s nickname, don’t ask**

 

_[10:20] Do you all have a nickname ?_

 

**[10:21] just jamie and i**

 

**[10:21] i’m padfoot btw**

 

_[10:22] Poor Lily and Reg don’t get a nickname ?_

 

**[10:23] technically prongs calls them sweetie, love, honey and other petnames but we will ignore this**

 

**[10:24] OH GOD**

 

_[10:24] WHAT ?_

 

**[10:25] PLEASE TELL ME YOU AND YOUR BOYFRIEND DON’T DO THIS**

 

_[10:26] WE DON’T_

 

**[10:27] that's a relief**

 

**[10:28] tss, you can be sure that when I will be in a relationship, there will be no pet name**

 

_[10:28] Good_

 

**[10:30] guess what i’m listening to ?**

 

_[10:31] Bohemian Rapsody ?_

 

**[10:32] HA good guess but no**

 

**[10:33] i’m listening to under pressure**

 

_[10:34] Oh, I like this song_

 

_[10:35] I’m listening to Athlete - Chances_

 

**[10:36] have you seen the dr who episode it’s in ?**

 

_[10:37] Peter forced me to, he’s a Whovian_

 

_[10:37] Fuck, I cried_

 

**[10:38] shhh remus it’s okay**

 

_[10:38] Easy for you to say, you never cried in front of a movie_

 

**[10:39] true**

 

**[10:40] i guess my heart is frozen forever**

 

**[10:40] cold and dead**

 

_[10:41] You’re way too soft for that_

 

_[10:42] You sent me 18 texts yesterday_

 

**[10:42] i’m not soft okay i’m punk rock**

 

_[10:43] Yeah I thought about this and I have to say_

 

_[10:44] You are the least punk rock person I know_

 

_[10:45] And that includes Peter, the nerd who plays chess and have four plants he named and gave petnames to_

 

**[10:46] i’m ignoring you from now on**

 

_[10:46] no i’m sorry!_

 

**[10:47] you better be**

 

_[10:48] i’m sorry i’m really sorry please forgive me_

 

**[10:49] remus**

 

_[10:50] i won’t do it again i swear_

 

**[10:51] remus it’s okay im not mad at you**

 

_[10:52] but you_

 

_[10:53] nevermind_

 

_[10:54] i have homeworks to do, see you_

 

**[10:55] bye remus !**

 

* * *

 

 

**[16:54] when’s your bday ?**

 

_[16:55] ?_

 

_[16:56] March the tenth ? Why ?_

 

**[16:56] !!!!!!!!!!**

 

**[16:57] so soon !!!!!!!!**

 

_[16:57] Not that soon_

 

**[16:58] 18 DAYS REMUS!!!!!!!!!!**

 

_[16:58] Oh, true_

 

**[16:59] what are you going to do for it ?**

 

_[17:00] My parents always take me to eat somewhere fancy_

 

_[17:01] And then I usually went with Peter somewhere fun like the cinema but it’s obviously not going to happen this year_

 

**[17:02] why did you two drifted apart ?**

 

_[17:03] That’s complicated_

 

**[17:04] fine**

 

**[17:05] that’s one of my questions**

 

_[17:06] What ?_

 

**[17:07] one of my three questions. you have to answer.**

 

_[17:08] but you already used one of them and i still have all of mine_

 

**[17:08] and ?**

 

_[17:09] fine_

 

_[17:13] peter and i started to drift apart about 6 months ago. it was a few weeks after my third ( and to this day last ) stay in a clinic. i don’t know why, but i started to notice a few annoying things about him i hadn’t noticed before. like the way he always pushes me for informations about private matters, or how stupid and needy he can be sometimes. and i started to find excuses when he wanted to hang out and to answer less and less to his texts and at some point he… understood ? and he gave up_

 

**[17:13] wow**

 

**[17:14] all of a sudden ?**

 

_[17:14] yeah_

 

**[17:15] and remus i’m sorry but**

 

**[17:16] a clinic ?**

 

_[17:17] hum, that is rather personal_

 

**[17:18] sorry, wont push it**

 

_[17:18] no_

 

_[17:18] i_

 

_[17:19] i’m not hiding it, it’s just_

 

_[17:19] i told you a lot_

 

**[17:20] and i haven’t told you anything back ?**

 

_[17:20] yeah_

 

**[17:21] okay well**

 

**[17:25] i got out of my biological family a bit more than a year ago. they have been emotionally abusive for as long as i can remember. they told me i was unworthy of living, that everything i did was wrong, that i was a disappointment… they were also highly queerphobic. a few months before i left, they started to become physically abusive as well. nothing too bad, but it was bad enough that it bruised. and i never told them about my gender ( for very obvious reasons ) but the perpetual “boy” and “he” started to make me more and more dysphoric. and one day they pissed me off too much and i don’t really deal well with anger so i told them i was queer and they really didn’t take it well. so i ran off at james’s and i never left**

 

_[17:26] wow_

 

_[17:27] What about Regulus ?_

 

**[17:29] he never left. he still lives with them. but they are far less abusive with him. they ARE, and they would no doubt beat him up if they found out about him being bi/ace, but for now he is safe**

 

**[17:30] and of course i am concerned, but there isn’t a lot i can do. he plans to leave once he turns 18, and he is 15.**

 

_[17:31] okay_

 

_[17:32] my turn, then ?_

 

**[17:33] you don’t have to.**

 

_[17:34] i want to._

 

_[17:34] just please don’t ask me for too much details_

 

**[17:35] i promise**

 

_[17:36] i have anorexia_

 

_[17:37] i have had it for a few years, and i’m definitely going well currently. i still skip a meal once in awhile, and i check my weight much more than most people, but i am going way better than before._

 

**[17:38] okay.**

 

**[17:39] information processed.**

 

_[17:40] okay._

 

**[17:41] and for the matter, i think you are very strong for going through this.**

 

_[17:42] i’m not, but thank you i suppose_

 

**[17:43] you are though. and you will see it one day.**

 

_[17:43] we’ll see._

 

_[17:44] i’m a bit scared of how easy it is for me to open up to you_

 

**[17:45] i can understand that. but remus im really glad you do.**

 

**[17:45] and if you want to take things more slowly, i would understand.**

 

_[17:46] thank you for that._

 

**[17:47] you’re welcome remus <3**

 

* * *

 

 

_[19:00] Sirius ?_

 

**[19:01] yeah?**

 

_[19:01] Hum hum_

 

_[19:02] <3 _

 

[19:02] I meant to sent it back to you when you said it but I was too anxious or whatever

 

**[19:03] awwww remus**

 

_[19:03] Shut up or I'll take it back_

 

**[19:03] im shutting up then**

 

**[19:04] <3**

 

_[19:05] Shut uuuuuuuup_

 

_[23:46] Goodnight Sirius_

 

**[23:47] sweet dreams remus**

 

* * *

 

 

February the 21th 

 

_[9:12] Hi_

 

**[9:13] hi remus !**

 

**[9:13] bored in class again ?**

 

_[9:14] I took the day off._

 

**[9:15] boyfriend day again ?**

 

_[9:16] Nah, for once it was for actual health reasons_

 

**[9:17] oh**

 

**[9:18] should i be worried ?**

 

_[9:19] I’m fine, but our PE teacher wanted to take us to the swimming pool and I have no intention to wear a swimsuit in front of the whole group_

 

**[9:20] okay that’s something i can understand**

 

**[9:21] so what are you doing now ?**

 

_[9:22] Well… I thought about that one episode of Doctor Who I had to watch with Pete and I’m starting to marathon it_

 

**[9:23] NERD**

 

_[9:24] I plead guilty._

 

_[9:25] Rose Tyler is everything I ever want to be in life._

 

**[9:25] she’s my personal hero**

 

_[9:26] I hope she doesn’t end up tragically._

 

**[9:26] dunno, i only watched a few episodes**

 

_[9:27] I’m watching the one with Dickens_

 

_[9:28] They are ghosts. It’s very weird, but it’s fun_

 

**[9:29] glad youre having fun while i learn MATH**

 

_[9:30] Math is fun !_

 

**[9:31] how????**

 

_[9:32] It’s logical, like riddles !_

 

**[9:33] then please do my homeworks for me**

 

_[9:34] Hmmm…_

 

_[9:34] Nah_

 

**[9:35] bitch**

 

**[9:36] why are you up so early ?**

 

_[9:36] I always wake up early, I like dawn_

 

_[9:37] And the stars_

 

_[9:37] And there is something about the moon that fascinates me_

 

_[9:38] And sometimes when it’s full I can’t sleep so I just stare at the sky_

 

**[9:39] that…**

 

**[9:39] is adorable.**

 

**[9:40] my remmy loves the moon**

 

**[9:41] remus and the moon**

 

**[9:41] remoon**

 

**[9:42] moonremus**

 

**[9:43] moonremmy**

 

**[9:43] moony**

 

**[9:44] MOONY**

 

_[9:45] I don’t understand what’s happening here_

 

**[9:45] what is happening is that i found your nickname**

 

_[9:46] Moony ?_

 

**[9:46] sounds cute**

 

**[9:46] like you**

 

**[9:47] sorry sorry, inappropriate**

 

_[9:48] Yeah it is_

 

_[9:49] But I kinda like the nickname, never had one before_

 

**[9:49] shit teacher looking at me bye moony**

 

* * *

 

 

**[12:01] finally i am free !**

 

_[12:02] Just for lunch break though_

 

**[12:03] no need to remind me**

 

**[12:04] how’s dr who going ?**

 

_[12:05] I’m into it_

 

**[12:05] *cough* nerd *cough***

 

_[12:06] No denial there_

 

_[12:07] So how was your morning ?_

 

**[12:08] as you know, math sucked but i had english which i really like.**

 

**[12:08] i love the teacher**

 

_[12:09] How are they ?_

 

**[12:11] she’s very strict but very kind ? like when i ran away and some of my cousins in the school started to… bully me ? in some way ? and she made them stop and offered me tea and biscuits to talk about it and now it’s our thing. also she talked all the teachers into using my correct pronouns and not calling me a boy anymore. and she supports james’s football team to the bones**

 

_[12:12] She sounds like a perfect teacher_

 

**[12:12] she is**

 

_[12:13] Prongs plays football ?_

 

**[12:13] i never mentioned it ?**

 

**[12:14] he is the captain and he devotes his life to it. reggie and lily are actually jealous**

 

_[12:15] Why would anyone willingly do sports ?_

 

**[12:16] i have no idea**

 

**[12:17] you never did any then ?**

 

_[12:20] When I was at the worst of my disorder. I used to jog. But that was the only time._

 

_[12:21] You ?_

 

**[12:22] never in my life. im against exercise**

 

_[12:23] Amen to that_

 

**[12:25] prongs tried to make me join so many times. but then i actually agreed to try to shut him up and he saw how bad i was and now he doesn’t ask me anymore.**

 

_[12:25] LMAO_

 

_[12:26] At least now you are free of this harassment_

 

**[12:27] you know the funniest part ?**

 

**[12:28] regulus is on another team. and they always compete against each other**

 

_[12:28] Modern Romeo and Juliet right here_

 

_[12:29] Is Lily playing too ?_

 

**[12:30] nope, but marlene and dorcas are in prongs’s team**

 

**[12:31] they make a killer duo**

 

_[12:31] That’s so cute !_

 

_[12:32] And you have unisex teams ?_

 

**[12:33] yep**

 

_[12:34] That’s great !_

 

**[12:35] you like watching sports ? or are you just fond of the unisex thing ?**

 

_[12:35] Unisex thing. You ?_

 

**[12:36] i like watching**

 

**[12:37] im prongs’s personal cheerleader**

 

**[12:38] with actual dancing and shit**

 

_[12:39] Please tell me your wear the skirt_

 

**[12:40] is there any other way to cheerlead ?**

 

_[12:41] That is the best news of my day_

 

**[12:42] glad i enlightened it ;)**

 

_[12:43] You did. I’m going back to my marathon, see you !_

 

**[12:44] have fun !**

 

* * *

 

 

**[18:12] hi remus!**

 

_[18:13] oh hi_

 

**[18:13] are you okay ?**

 

_[18:14] at the moment ? not really_

 

**[18:15] did something happen ?**

 

_[18:17] i was already not feeling really well since the beginning of the afternoon or something so i was in the bathroom weighing myself ( that already was pretty bad ) but then i realized i had forgotten my phone in my room and that fenrir called me twice and i didn’t pick up_

 

**[18:18] fenrir ?**

 

_[18:19] the boyfriend_

 

_[18:20] i’m the worst boyfriend ever he needed me_

 

**[18:21] hey moony it’s okay you couldn’t pick up at the moment you cant be available all the time**

 

_[18:22] of course i should be_

 

_[18:23] he needs me_

 

_[18:23] he was so mad at me_

 

_[18:24] and he was drunk_

 

**[18:25] moony im sorry**

 

**[18:26] you didnt deserve to be yelled at**

 

_[18:27] of course i did_

 

_[18:28] he has so many issues and instead of helping him i just add to it_

 

**[18:29] did he tell you this ?**

 

_[18:30] he had every right to_

 

**[18:31] REMUS OF COURSE HE DIDN’T**

 

_[18:32] i was too busy with my own problems to help him_

 

**[18:33] REMUS YOUR PROBLEMS ARE IMPORTANT**

 

_[18:34] not compared to his_

 

**[18:35] HE HAS NO RIGHT TO TELL YOU THIS EVER**

 

_[18:36] you don’t know anything about this okay?_

 

_[18:37] why did i even think it would be a good idea to tell you about this_

 

**[18:38] remus please listen to me**

 

_[18:39] just leave me alone_

 

**[18:40] remus no im sorry i shouldnt have put it like this**

 

_[18:41] i shouldn’t even talk to you, it’s like i’m cheating on him_

 

**[18:42] remus of course it isnt**

 

**[18:46] remus?**

 

**[18:51] moony?**

  
**[19:00] shit**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that took an eternity to edit. please leave a comment or kudos if you feel like it !
> 
> also my tumblr is @jk-destroyed-our-best-gay-ships ( forever proud of the url )


	4. Our time apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius is worried sick, James and Lily are supportive friends, and there is a mention of the weirdest movie ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uuuuurgh this is the chapter which took me the more time ! And it is the shortest ! But it's necessary for the greater good : the Plot.

February the 21th

 

**[19:01] JAMES**

 

**[19:02] JAMES QUIT SNOGGING LILY IT’S AN EMERGENCY**

 

**[19:04] PRONGS**

 

**[19:04] PRONGS**

 

**[19:04] PRONGS**

 

**[19:04] PRONGS**

 

[19:05] you evil cockblock better have a good reason for that

 

**[19:05] JAMES THANK GOD YOU’RE HERE**

 

[19:06] Well obviously

 

**[19:07] i don’t like moony’s boyfriend**

 

[19:07] IIIIII’m going back to snogging my girlfriend bye

 

**[19:08] JAMES**

 

[19:09] What am I supposed to say sirius ? You have a crush on this bloke, of course you don’t like his bf

 

**[19:09] i do not have a crush on moony**

 

[19:10] Riiiiiiiight

 

**[19:10] and more importantly it’s not about that**

 

**[19:11] james he isn’t treating him well**

 

**[19:12] i dont think remus is well with him**

 

[19:12] Okay padfoot

 

[19:13] Don’t you think you might be a little biased on the issue ?

 

[19:14] No matter what you say, you text that guy all the time and you always have that stupid smirk when you do. You talk about him all the time. You gave him a petname. You bloody have a crush on him.

 

**[19:17] moony isn’t a petname**

 

[19:18] Just admit you’re jealous padfoot. You hate this boyfriend of his because of that

 

**[19:19] it’s not about that !**

 

[19:20] Sirius just face it, it is

 

**[19:21] JUST SHUT UP**

 

\--- Incoming call : Pads-Bae-The-Love-Of-My-Life<3 ---

 

“Pads, please stop changing you contact name on my phone it’s quite anno… Shit are you crying ?”

 

**‘No you j-jerk I’m just sniffing really hard for absolutely no reasons. Will you listen to me now ?”**

 

“Shit Padfoot I’m really sorry.”

 

**“Just shut up and listen t-to me, okay ? It has nothing to do with whatever my feelings for Remus might b-be. He just told me that his boyfriend had pho-phoned him twice while he was… doing something else and apparently when he called him back he was drunk. But when he told me about it he was f-fucking c-c-crying, James. He said he was the worst boyfriend ever, that he failed him, t-that he needed him… F-fuck Prongs he was crying so much…”**

 

“Okay so his boyfriend has important issues and needs important support. Doesn’t make him a bad person, right ?”

 

**“Yeah but Remus said something like his o-own issues weren’t import-tant comp-compared to his and... t-trust me Prongs his issues are r-really important and… F-f-fuck I…”**

 

“Sh okay okay calm down a second Padfoot. Please breathe. Please try to stop crying. Breathe in and out. Don’t go and have a panic attack on top of it, okay ?”

 

**“Ok-kay.”**

 

“Very good. Feeling a bit better ? Want me to give Lily the phone so she can hum you something nice ?”

 

**“No I’m g-good.”**

 

“Good. Now, his boyfriend might have asked him help this one time and didn’t realize he needed help too. Do you have any other hint he isn’t treating him well ?”

 

**“I-I… I dunno he s-speaks a lot about him but never give any d-details... And all I know about him is t-that he likes heavy metal and is 20 and…”**

 

“Wow okay slow down Pads. The guy is 20 ?”

 

**“Y-yeah but…”**

 

“And how old is Remus ?”

 

**“16.”**

 

“Fuck. Fuck Sirius ! This is bloody illegal !”

 

**“Is it ? It’s not like he’s f-fifty there are j-just four years of d-difference…”**

 

“Still illegal. Still not a good thing. Sirius what else ?”

 

**“Er I don’t know ! He… When he joined us for Never Have I Ever it was because he was supposed t-to text him to tell him if he was available for a d-date but he never texted and when I suggested he texts him first he brushed it off ? I don’t know James !”**

 

“Okay that might have been excusable because of special circumstances. Maybe try to question him subtly to know if situations like those happen a lot ?”

 

**“Er, right… T-that’s the problem… When he told me that I… I reacted badly… And I started to yell… Well not to yell because we were t-texting b-b-b-but-”**

 

“Sh, it’s okay, I know what you meant.”

 

**“And I told him his boyfriend had no right to make him feel like his problems aren’t imp-important and he got all defensive and he isn’t answering t-to me anymore..”**

 

“Fuck. Fuck. Bloody fuck.”

 

**“J-James ?”**

 

“It’s exactly how you were in first year. When I asked about your parents. You got all defensive and told me they loved you. And when I found out about the - Fuck.”

 

**“JAMES DO YOU THINK HE IS B-”**

 

“No ! No Sirius I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please please don’t panic. Lily is googling to find something to help. Breathe love, please.”

 

**“I-I… I…”**

 

“No, no no no - Hey Sirius it’s Lily can you hear me ?”

 

**“Y-Yeah I…”**

 

“Are you having a panic attack, love ?”

 

**“Y-Y-Yeah… L-Lils I-”**

 

“Okay okay. I’m going to need you to hang up - just for a second ! I’m calling you on my own phone. James is running back home - to you. Okay for one second, darling ?”

 

**“K-Kay…”**

 

“Great. You’re really brave, love.”

 

Call ended

 

* * *

 

February the 22th

 

[10:12] Okay i’m at the library

 

**[10:13] good. i think i have found one website or two**

 

[10:14] You’re sure you want to do it ?

 

**[10:14] lily’s with me im fine**

 

[10:15] If it’s all becoming too much you can stop whenever you want, you know that ?

 

**[10:16] yes james i KNOW no please back to the books**

 

[10:16] I’m looking into the psychology section. What does your website says ?

 

**[10:17] okay it has a list of signs**

 

**[10:18] half of it are about things i cant know without seeing him**

 

**[10:18] and targeted to women abused by men**

 

**[10:20] james i have one**

 

[10:21] What is it ?

 

**[10:21] less social**

 

**[10:23] he mentioned that he stopped being friend with his best mate for no reasons six months ago and he never mentioned any other friend he hangs up with**

 

[10:25] Seems like a sign, but he could also not be very sociable. And we don’t know since when they are together. Might be unrelated

 

[10:25] Let’s still add it on the list

 

**[10:28] you’re finding any books ?**

 

[10:29] I might have one, leave me five minutes to find the pages we want

 

**[10:32] PRONGS BEING SCARED OF MISSING HIS PHONE CALLS IS ONE OF THE SIGNS**

 

[10:33] Okay, did it happen more than once ?

 

**[10:34] no, but he often stopped to answer because his bf was calling him**

 

**[10:35] fuck i even teased him about it**

 

[10:35] On the list

 

**[10:38] “never gives a lot of details about his relationship”, that’s it, he never tells me about his boyfriend, even if he mentions it a lot**

 

[10:39] On the list, top of it

 

[10:41] Okay here’s a summary of what the passage in this book said

 

[10:44] An abusive relationship is based on one of the partners having superiority/control on the other. Emotional abuse is always present in this kind of relationships, but physical abuse might not be. The abuser makes sure to be always the focus of attention, belittling the abused one’s feelings or issues. Their goal is to control their partner. Emotional abuse can involve manipulation, threats, insults, blackmailing… They also guilt and shame the other, often on things they have no control on. They isolate their partner. One of the most spread mean of control is accusing the other of things they didn’t do, like cheating.

 

[10:47] Pads ?

 

**[10:48] yea yeah im still here**

 

[10:48] What do you think ?

 

**[10:49] we definitely add “accusations of cheating” on the list**

 

**[10:50] belittling too**

 

[10:51] Okay, i’ll let you know if i find something else

 

**[10:52] skipping classes or such because of him is a sign too, but you reg and lily do it too… list or not ?**

 

[10:53] List. Unlike us, remus’s boyfriend doesn’t go to school anymore so remus would be the only one to get in trouble for it

 

[10:54] We can always take it back later if is invalidated

 

**[10:55] he definitely apologizes too easily and too much**

 

[10:56] Straight to the list

 

**[10:59] and he finds excuses for him when the boyfriend is acting badly**

 

[11:00] List. Does the boyfriend even have a name ?

 

**[11:00] fenrir**

 

[11:01] Sounds like an anime bad guy name

 

**[11:01] i know**

 

[11:09] I have something else

 

[11:12] Abuse often works as a circle : after a physically abusive act ( or a severe emotional one ) the abuser will find excuses for his behaviour or lead the victim to believe it didn’t happen/was their fault. Then there is a sort of honeymoon moment when the abuser wants to appear like the perfect partner and act all nicely. finally there is a setup for another scene of abuse and the circle continue

 

**[11:15] yyeah sound bit lke what he descrbed**

 

[11:16] It’s too much ?

 

**[10:57] hey James it’s Lily i think we could all use a break from this. pause ?**

 

[10:58] Message received, you two take care. I’ll be home in ten minutes

 

* * *

 

 

February the 23th

 

[16:16] Sirius ?

 

**[16:17] the one and only**

 

[16:17] I know we said we’ll watch labyrinth tonight but reg just send me a text and he really needs lily and i right now. Are you okay with waiting until tomorrow ?

 

**[16:18] its okay, he texted me too. i dont think i can go out and see him, but you hug him for me alright ?**

 

[16:18] Alright

 

[16:18] Something wrong ?

 

**[16:24] remus still isnt answering**

 

[16:25] What did you text him ?

 

**[16:26] that i was sorry or asking him stuffs that werent any of my business and that i wont ever question him again if he talked to me**

 

**[16:26] fuck prongs what if he never talks to me again**

 

[16:27] I’m sure he’ll text you eventually. Give the bloke some time to work it out. From what you told me, he probably thinks it would be cheating on him or some bullshit like that. But he’ll come to it.

 

[16:27] Remember what we said ?

 

**[16:27] yea yeah**

 

[16:28] Sirius ?

 

**[16:28] give him some space, dont bring up the boyfriend subject, stay supportive of him, dont hold it against him if he doesnt want to answer or to text sometimes, only give him help if he asks for it**

 

[16:29] Good

 

[16:29] Confrontation won’t work

 

**[16:30] i knoooooow**

 

**[16:31] but he could stay in that situation for months**

 

[16:31] Waiting and supporting him is the best way to help him and you know that, pads

 

**[16:32] but i dont want him to have to go as much as me before he realizes something is wrong**

 

[16:32] That won’t happen. It was your family, and it’s “only” his bf. He doesnt even live with him

 

**[16:33] maybe**

 

[16:33] He’ll get out of it, okay ?

 

[16:34] Just like reg will

 

**[16:35] yeah**

 

[16:35] Boy we have some unique boyfriends

 

**[16:35] not my bf but yeah**

 

[16:36] Okay i see reg. Ttyl ?

  
**[16:36] yeah, bye**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i would like to use this space to give people some ressources if they are worried for a friend's relationship, or for their own. obviously i am limited in this fic with what i am able to show, so here are some things you could use ( sorry i cant link things in the notes apparently ?)
> 
> here is a link to a very complete article about abuse : https://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm
> 
> here is a link to an article about the signs your friend is in an abusive relationship : http://elitedaily.com/women/seeing-social-butterflys-demise-domestic-abuse-beyond-black-eyes/1020109/
> 
> and here are some phone numbers to call if you are worried : http://stoprelationshipabuse.org/get-help/resources/
> 
> it is important to remember that abusers might be of any gender, any age, any social class, any sexuality, and they don't always have mental disorders. not all abusive relationships are physically abusive. pushing, grabbing hard or pulling hair is physical violence. being guilted or threatened into sex is rape, and so is ignoring your boundaries while having sex.
> 
> if you feel like you are in an abusive relationship, your situation isn't helpless. check out these resources and do moe researches - remember to clean up your internet history if you worried your partner might catch you and "make you pay". i and a lot of people care about you and believe in you - you can get out of this ! <3


	5. Building trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus texts back, Regulus isn't fine, and more gay flags the merrier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright so as usual, tw abuse and tw eating disorder
> 
> this chapter has been exhausting to write, but i have great plans for the Plot my friends ! big things in coming soon !

February the 25th

 

_ [15:02] hi sirius _

 

**[15:02] MOONY**

 

**[15:02] im so sorry for all the things i said**

 

_ [15:03] it’s okay _

 

**[15:03] really ?**

 

_ [15:03] as long as you don’t do it again _

 

**[15:04] i solemnly swear**

 

_ [15:04] Good _

 

**[15:04] so have you been up to ?**

 

_ [15:05] Not so much, spent a lot of time with the boyfriend, failed my chemistry test, listened to Troye’s album at least 23 times _

 

_ [15:05] And yeah I know Troye’s music is shit _

 

**[15:06] what ? no it’s pretty good i think**

 

_[15:07] Well you like whatever you want_

 

_ [15:07] So what’s new for you ? _

 

**[15:08] not much either, reg had troubles with the family**

 

_ [15:08] Is he okay ? _

 

**[15:09] he’ll be. he’s upset because they told him if he studied anything else than politics after high school he would be a disappointment for the entire family**

 

_ [15:10] God it’s really awful _

 

**[15:11] we’ll get him out of this**

 

**[15:12] what do you want to study ?**

 

_ [15:12] I’m not sure I’ll go to uni _

 

**[15:13] too expensive ?**

 

_ [15:14] Just not really interested _

 

**[15:14] then what are you gonna do ?**

 

_ [15:15] I’m not sure, but it’s not like it really matters _

 

**[15:15] but you must have some ideas for the future ?**

 

_ [15:15] Yeah, some _

 

**[15:16] like what ?**

 

_ [15:16] Definitely moving in with Fenrir _

 

**[15:17] oh okay**

 

**[15:19] i’m not sure personally**

 

_ [15:19] Well you still have some time _

 

**[15:20] but like you, i already know you i’ll move in with ;)**

 

_ [15:20] James ? _

 

**[15:21] hell yeah**

 

**[15:21] i even drew our dream student flat**

 

_ [15:22] You’re an artist ?? _

 

**[15:23] duh?**

 

**[15:23] the notebook?**

 

_ [15:23] Your art was in it ? _

 

**[15:24] you never opened it ???**

 

_ [15:25] No, I respect people’s privacy ? _

 

**[15:25] fair enough but**

 

**[15:25] nevermind**

 

_ [15:26] I bet you art is amazing _

 

_ [15:26] Shit I have to go _

 

_ [15:27] Bye _

 

**[15:27] bye moony!**

 

* * *

 

 

February the 26th

 

**[18:34] hey moons !**

 

* * *

 

 

February the 27th

 

_ [09:13] Hey Padfoot _

 

_ [09:14] Sorry about yesterday, bf day again _

 

**[09:17] dont worry :) having a good day so far ?**

 

_ [09:18] Skipped school again, so yes _

 

**[09:18] why?**

 

_ [09:19] Just didn’t want to go _

 

**[09:19] you know, i’m surprised a nerd like you skips school so much**

 

_ [09:20] God, Sirius, will you never stop prying ? _

 

**[09:21] sorry**

 

**[09:22] really really sorry remus i shouldn’t have said anything, forgive me please ?**

 

_ [09:23] It’s just that you’re always trying to make me talk about private stuffs _

 

**[09:23] i know i’ll stop i’m sorry**

 

_ [09:24] Let’s just talk about something else _

 

**[09:25] alright**

 

**[09:25] how’s dr who going ?**

 

_ [09:26] It’s brilliant _

 

_ [09:26] I watched 10 episodes saturday _

 

**[09:27] so is rose still your hero ?**

 

_ [09:27] SHE IS THE BEST PERSON WHO EVER WALKED THIS EARTH _

 

_ [09:27] AND SHE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER _

 

**[09:28] wow okay casual spoiler**

 

_ [09:28] Wait you were planning on watching the show ? _

 

**[09:29] no, but i might one day !**

 

_ [09:30] So until then I just shut up and don’t tell a thing ? _

 

**[09:30] yeah**

 

_ [09:30] Riiiiight _

 

_ [09:31] Guess what I’m listening to ? _

 

**[09:32] panic at the disco ?**

 

_ [09:33] Nope, but good try _

 

_ [09:33] Troye - for him. _   
  


**[09:34] YES BRING ME THE GAY**

 

_ [09:34] Come and get it yourself, you lazy arse _

 

**[09:35] OY im hurt**

 

_ [09:35] Drama queen _

 

**[09:36] EVEN MORE HURT**

 

_ [09:37] Oh well, I’ll live with it _

 

**[09:37] REMUS**

 

_ [09:38] God you’re so funny sometimes _

 

**[09:39] that’s why you love me ;)**

 

_ [09:40] yeah _

 

_ [09:40] i need to go, bye _

 

**[09:41] see ya rem !**

 

* * *

 

 

**[17:47] remus, i need you to answer a very important question**

 

_ [17:48] what the hell _

 

**[17:48] james and i are disagreeing on something**

 

_ [17:48] Oh _

 

**[17:49] team anna or team elsa ?**

 

_ [17:49] How old are you guys ? _

 

**[17:50] EXCUSE ME disney princesses are a perfectly valid passion for two 17 y/o**

 

_ [17:50] Riiiiiight _

 

_ [17:51] Team Anna I guess ? _

 

**[17:51] WHAT REMUS NO**

 

_ [17:51] She’s sweet and caring and naive _

 

**[17:52] but elsa is pursuing her dreams of freedom and learning the beauty of her powers !**

 

_ [17:54] Yes but Anna wants everyone to be happy and to be surrounded by people she loves and that’s enough to make her happy, she isn’t even jealous of Elsa’s powers _

 

**[17:55] but but… ICE POWERS !**

 

_ [17:55] Wow, your argumentation completely astonishes me _

 

**[17:56] i have that effect on a lot of people sweetie ;)**

 

_ [17:56] yeah sure _

 

* * *

 

 

February the 28th

 

_ [10:04] Just so you know, i’m having a boyfriend day again so no texting ! _

 

**[10:05] kay, hope you have fun !**

 

_ [10:05] I will ! _

 

* * *

 

 

**[18:12] hey remus !**

 

**[18:12] had a good day ?**

 

_ [18:13] no i’m fucked sirius i cant do anything right _

 

**[18:14] wow wait a sec breathe. of course you aren’t ! why would you even say that ?**

 

_ [18:14] i just am _

 

_ [18:17] we were supposed to have a boyfriend day so i skipped school again obviously and waited all morning but it was like midday and he still wasn’t there so i thought he had an issue and couldn’t come so i decided to go to school for the afternoon and then when i arrived the headmaster saw me and he started to lecture me about not going to class often enough and told me he would call my parents to talk about it but then after classes when i went back at mine fenrir was there and apparently we were supposed to meet in the afternoon only and he was waiting for me for hours _

 

_ [18:17] i’m so fucked _

 

**[18:18] okay remus please try to calm down. i’m sure your headmaster just wants you to feel more comfortable at school ! you’ll just have your bf days on weekends, right ? and i’m sure he’ll still let you skip school when it’s necessary**

 

_ [18:19] i can’t have my boyfriend days on weekends _

 

_ [18:20] he’s always busy _

 

**[18:20] but you always skip stuffs for him, he can do the same right ?**

 

_ [18:21] of course he can’t _

 

**[18:21] why?**

 

_ [18:21] fuck sirius will you never stop to pry _

 

_ [18:22] you always say you’ll stop and you fucking never do _

 

**[18:23] i’m sorry remus**

 

**[18:23] i really am**

 

_ [18:24] if i tell you why he can’t do it will you stop ? _

 

**[18:25] i promise moony**

 

_ [18:29] he has no more links to his family since he’s eighteen, and he is currently unemployed. he struggles to pay his bills and rent and he can never buy the nice things he wants. so on weekends when his friends are out of work he rathers stay with them and relax than having to put up with me and my issues. _

 

_ [18:32] sirius ? _

 

**[18:33] okay**

 

**[18:34] so do you feel any better ?**

 

_ [18:34] still feel guilty about fenrir and anxious about my parents meeting with my headmaster but i calmed down a bit _

 

**[18:35] good. try to put on a nice show and drink some tea ?**

 

_ [18:35] tea sounds nice, but my parents are eating in the kitchen and they’ll offer me some food if i come in and i can’t do that right now _

 

**[18:36] you’re not gonna eat at all ?**

 

_ [18:36] i’ll have some tea and maybe some tomato juice later _

 

**[18:37] i guess i can’t say anything to make you change your mind ?**

 

_ [18:37] no _

 

_ [18:38] i’m probably going to watch dr who again _

 

**[18:38] good ! but don’t spoil me**

 

_ [18:39] Martha reveals to be a robot send by the Daleks to work out what the Doctor’s flaws are _

 

**[18:39] DAMMIT**

 

**[18:40] oh wait**

 

**[18:40] it’s not true isn’t it ?**

 

_ [18:41] Who knows ? _

 

**[18:41] you do**

 

_ [18:42] Oh right _

 

**[18:43] you sarcastic nerd**

 

_ [18:44] You fake punk _

 

**[18:44] HEY**

 

**[18:45] MOONY WHY SO MEAN**

 

**[18:45] I AM DEEPLY HURT**

 

_ [18:46] A true punk will give me the middle finger and ignore my hateful comment _

 

**[18:46] how would you even know ?**

 

_ [18:47] Even I am more punk than you Padfoot _

 

**[18:47] HOW DARE YOU**

 

_ [18:48] I’m cold hearted like that _

 

_ [18:49] My parents left the kitchen, I might try to go for my tomato juice _

 

**[18:49] good luck !**

 

_ [19:14] Came across my dad on my way, got caught in a lecture about how hiding in my room wasn’t a way to solve my issues ( thanks for clearing that up dad, I really thought my bed held the secret of mental stability ) and didn’t get my food since I just wanted to end this _

 

**[19:14] fuck you’re alright ?**

 

_ [19:15] I’m used to it by now _

 

_ [19:15] I’ll just crawl back in my bed and marathon Friends _

 

**[19:16] is marathoning your way to deal with everything ?**

 

_ [19:16] Yep. _

 

_ [19:17] Monica and Chandler are taking good care of me, so bye ! _

 

**[19:17] bye remus**

 

* * *

 

 

March the 1st

 

**[08:03] ONLY 10 DAYS LEFT BEFORE THE BIG DAY REMUS**

 

_ [08:03] WOW TRUE _

 

**[08:04] I’LL MAKE YOU THE GREATEST PARTY**

 

_ [08:04] I SUCK AT PARTYING BUT SURE _

 

**[08:05] no but seriously i hope you have a great day and i wish i could celebrate it with you <3**

 

_ [08:05] Thank you Sirius <3 _

 

**[08:07] so what are you doing today ?**

 

_ [08:07] School, not much. I may go to the library for a bit _

 

**[08:07] sounds great !**

 

_ [08:08] You ? _

 

**[08:09] classes, hanging out with reg**

 

[08:10] How is he going ?

 

**[08:10] not really well. i’m starting to get worried.**

 

_ [08:11] You want to tell me about it ? _

 

**[08:15] i’m really scared our family will end up breaking him. he is not as stubborn as me, and way more sensitive. and he desperately hang up to the idea that they love him enough to accept him. for example about the fact he dreams to do an art school. i know they would get mad at him. but what we are all terrified of is them finding out about james and lily. it would be the worst for him. and i know they are able to lock him up or some other creepy thing to make him like them. and i hate that i cant protect him as much as he needs me to.**

 

_ [08:16] Sirius, it will get better. You, James and Lily are there for him. And if things get really bad, I’m sure you can find a way to save him. _

 

**[08:17] thank you**

 

**[08:17] if you ever needed support too, you know i’m here, right ?**

 

_ [08:18] I know. Thank you Sirius _

 

* * *

 

 

**[11:16] uuuuurg, chemistry again**

 

_ [11:17] There is a question I need to ask _

 

**[11:17] yeah ?**

 

_ [11:18] You’re taking your A levels right ? _

 

**[11:18] yeah ?**

 

_ [11:18] Why did you take chemistry if you hate it so much ? _

 

**[11:19] i dont hate the subject really, i hate the teacher.**

 

**[11:19] and also, i know it might sound stupid but…**

 

**[11:20] i kinda want to work in a hospital later ?**

 

**[11:20] maybe not as a doctor but something like that…**

 

_ [11:21] That would really suit you _

 

**[11:21] really?**

 

_ [11:21] Absolutely _

 

_ [11:22] You’re kind and caring, and I guess I can picture you like that _

 

_ [11:22] What would you want to do if you’re not a doctor ? _

 

**[11:23] idk, either nurse or developing meds ?**

 

_ [11:23] You would be so great as a nurse _

 

**[11:24] people always tell me that but it’s usually to make fun of me bc i wear makeup and skirts and “real boys don’t do that”**

 

**[11:25] bc fuck my gender identity, i’ll always be a boy for these people**

 

_ [11:25] I’m sorry _

 

_ [11:26] Bigots are the worst _

 

_ [11:26] But these aren’t the reason I can picture you as a nurse _

 

**[11:27] i know**

 

**[11:27] thank you**

 

_ [11:28] Just saying the truth :) _

 

**[11:28] so you never told me, what are your A levels ?**

 

_ [11:29] History, English Literature, Sociology _

 

**[11:30] sociology sounds pretty interesting**

 

_ [11:30] It is, most of the time _

 

_ [11:31] So yours are… ? _

 

**[11:31] chemistry, math, english and biology**

 

_ [11:32] Which one is your favorite ? _

 

**[11:32] probably biology**

 

**[11:33] you ?**

 

_ [11:33] Literature _

 

**[11:34] you really are a nerd**

 

_ [11:34] You already told me that, yeah _

 

**[11:35] it’s getting truer and truer**

 

_ [11:35] Pretty sure that’s not a real word _

 

**[11:35] shut up**

 

_ [11:36] Sorry _

 

* * *

 

 

**[17:47] moony you need to help james and me with something**

 

_ [17:56] *I _

 

**[17:56] yeah yeah whatever**

 

**[17:57] if we were to, let’s say, paint something in the great hall of our school**

 

_ [17:57] Oh God _

 

**[17:58] should we paint a gay flag or a hand doing some rude gesture ?**

 

_ [17:58] You want to give your whole school the middle finger ? _

 

**[17:58] how do you just assume that was my proposition and not james’s ?**

 

_ [17:59] Really I don’t know what gave it away _

 

_ [17:59] But anyway I might have an idea to improve this _

 

**[18:00] how can you improve perfection ?**

 

_ [18:00] Instead of painting one great flag, paint a thousand of small ones all over the school so people can’t clean it all off and your entire school is LGBTQ friendly _

 

**[18:00] DAMMIT MOONY THAT IS SOME PRANKING GAME**

 

**[18:01] JAMES IS APPLAUDING**

 

**[18:01] HE SAYS YOU’RE BETTER AT THIS THAN ME AND YOU JUST REPLACE ME AND I’M NOT EVEN OFFENDED**

 

_ [18:01] Okay, I’m pretty sure you must be exaggerating _

 

**[18:01] I’M NOT**

 

**[18:02] THAT WAS BRILLIANT**

 

_ [18:02] If you say so _

 

**[18:06] james called reg and lily to tell them and they are going to help with it !!!!**

 

**[18:06] and that’s saying something since lily thinks pranking is immature and reg could get some serious punishment from our family if they found out**

 

**[18:06] shit**

 

**[18:07] i have to stop reg from helping us**

 

_ [18:07] I don’t think that’s the best thing to do _

 

_ [18:07] How would you have reacted if James had forbad you to do pranks when you still lived with them ? _

 

**[18:08] …**

 

**[18:08] i see your point**

 

_ [18:08] Besides, you should be proud of him for going against your family’s rules _

 

**[18:09] i guess you’re right**

 

**[18:09] but…**

 

_ [18:09] It’s normal to be worried, Padfoot _

 

_ [18:10] And I’m sure James and Lily are worried as well _

 

_ [18:10] But you can’t stop Regulus from doing what he wants _

 

**[18:10] i know**

 

_ [18:11] That doesn’t mean you can’t help to keep them safe _

 

**[18:11] okay**

 

**[18:11] i’m just so used to protecting him**

 

_ [18:12] It’s understandable Sirius _

 

**[18:12] i guess**

 

**[18:12] i kind of ruined the mood, yeah ?**

 

_ [18:13] You needed comfort and that’s okay _

 

_ [18:13] By the way did you tell James ? _

 

**[18:14] no he worries enough without me burdening him**

 

_ [18:14] Well maybe you can share that together ? Support each other ? _

 

**[18:16] maybe i’ll try**

 

_ [18:16] Good :) _

 

_ [18:17] I’m proud of you _

 

**[18:17] thank you moony**

 

_ [18:18] You’re welcome :) _

 

* * *

 

 

**[23:47] goodnight remus <3**

  
_ [23:48] Goodnight Sirius <3 _


	6. It will go well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Sirius are getting closer and closer as the days go by and they know they can tell each other everything now.
> 
> ... Right ?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( i am so so so sorry for the terrible summary )
> 
> WOW THAT WAS SO TOUGH TO WRITE ! but this chapter is really a greatly important one for my writing so i'm glad i made it in the end !
> 
> trigger warnings for mentions of eating disorder and family abuse

March the 2th

 

_ [18:21] Big Bang Theory isn’t so great _

 

**[18:22] agree**

 

**[18:22] the laugh tracks are way overused**

 

_ [18:23] True, but I was thinking about all the sexist jokes _

 

**[18:23] don’t forget the racist ones**

 

_ [18:23] Why are all TV shows so problematic ? _

 

**[18:24] well idk lily told me that orange is the new black was pretty cool**

 

_ [18:24] I’ll try that I guess _

 

**[18:25] wow hide the enthusiasm moony**

 

_ [18:25] I’ll try that I guess !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _

 

**[18:26] better !**

 

_ [18:26] Thank you. _

 

_ [18:27] How was your day ? _

 

**[18:27] pretty fine. i have to wake up early tomorrow for the prank**

 

**[18:28] also this weekend we’re having another drinking games night with the crew**

 

_ [18:28] Same people as last time ? _

 

**[18:28] frank and marlene cant make it but em will join**

 

_ [18:29] Em ? _

 

**[18:29] emmeline. another friend who’s one year younger than us**

 

**[18:30] we are a terrible influence for her**

 

_ [18:30] You corrupt young children ? _

 

**[18:31] moony**

 

**[18:31] prongs and lily are shoving their tongues in my baby brother’s mouth and i’m the bad one ?**

 

_ [18:32] I dare you to screenshot this and send this to the three of them _

 

**[18:33] MOONY YOU EVIL**

 

**[18:34] I DID IT BUT IT’S YOUR FAULT IF THEY HATE ME**

 

_ [18:34] You know you can turn down a dare, right ? _

 

**[18:35] punks don’t turn down dares**

 

_ [18:35] And punks get overprotective of their little brothers ? _

 

**[18:36] obviously**

 

_ [18:37] Riiiiiiight… _

 

**[18:38:] urgh**

 

**[18:38] i have an essay to write**

 

_ [18:39] Well go and work then _

 

**[18:40] but i would have to stop talking to you :(**

 

_ [18:41] I’ll still be there once you’re done _

 

**[18:42] …**

 

**[18:42] fine…**

 

**[18:43] bye moony <3**

 

_ [18:43] Bye Sirius <3 _

 

**[22:10] update : prongs answered with a wink face, lily told me to kindly never comment on her relationship ever again, and reg told me “jealous ?”**

 

_ [22:11] In Reg’s hypothetical scenario, would you just be jealous of their relationship or do you have a crush on one of them ? _

 

**[22:12] knowing him he probably meant i had a crush on prongs**

 

_ [22:12] Does he really think that ? Is he jealous ? _

 

**[22:13] no he's just joking**

 

**[22:14] the three of them trust each other so much they don’t ever get jealous**

 

March the 3rd

 

_ [08:46] Wish me luck for my parents and me meeting the headmaster _

 

**[08:47] good luck ! let me know how it went !**

 

_ [10:03] It actually went better than I thought it would _

 

**[10:07] that’s great !**

 

_ [10:08] Yeah, I had a bit of a lecture but then we talked about what would make me feel more comfortable at school and such _

 

_ [10:08] And I plan to talk about it with Fenrir tonight _

 

**[10:09] im proud of you !**

 

_ [10:09] Nothing to be proud of _

 

**[10:10] well i just assume it’s not really easy to talk about things in a relationship**

 

_ [10:11] Do Reg, Lily and James get troubles like that ? _

 

**[10:11] absolutely not**

 

**[10:12] they are the most communicative relationship i have ever seen**

 

_ [10:12] Good for them _

 

**[10:13] yeah, they definitely are #relationshipgoals**

 

_ [10:13] Please don’t _

 

**[10:14] ?**

 

_ [10:15] Hashtags ? In a text convo ? We cannot be friends bye _

 

**[10:15] #StopJudgingMe2k17**

 

_ [10:16] No _

 

**[10:17] #HashtagsAreTheBest**

 

_ [10:17] Stop it _

 

**[10:18] #HatersGonnaHate**

 

_ [10:18] Go back to the Twitter hell you came from _

 

**[10:19] are you on any social media ?**

 

_ [10:20] Used to have a Facebook, deleted it because Facebook sucks. You ? _

 

**[10:21] fb, insta**

 

**[10:22] gotta share my perfect face with the world**

 

_ [10:23] Wait I think my teacher is starting to notice something ttyl _

 

**[10:23] bye moony !**

 

**[16:12] note to self : never engage in a modeling competition with lily**

 

**[16:13] and NEVER makes lily’s boyfriends the judges of that competition**

 

_ [16:13] Oh my god _

 

_ [16:14] Where did that come from ? _

 

**[16:15] lily and me have an ongoing debate about which of us is the prettiest**

 

**[16:16] and we got carried away**

 

_ [16:16] What are you modeling ? _

 

**[16:17] mainly skirts but as we both are punks leather jackets and such joined quite soon**

 

_ [16:18] Why wasn’t I invited ? I feel personally offended _

 

**[16:18] aw moony :(**

 

**[16:19] wanted to see me in a short skirt ;) ?**

 

_ [16:20] Hum _

 

_ [16:20] Ace, remember ? _

 

**[20:21] you could appreciate the aesthetic of it**

 

_ [20:22] Or I could just watch you trying to walk like a model _

 

**[20:23] i’ll let you know that my high heels game is gold**

 

_ [20:24] How ??? These look like the most uncomfortable things ever ??? _

 

**[20:25] practice.**

 

_ [20:26] I used to be kinda friend with a girl at the clinic and she told me the first time she wore heels for an entire day her feet bled _

 

**[20:26] yeah, that can happen**

 

_ [20:26] I will never fucking wear those _

 

**[20:27] not everyone can be as fab as me, i guess**

 

_ [20:28] Not even Lily ? _

 

**[20:29] THE ONLY REASON SHE WON IS BECAUSE HER BOYFRIENDS WERE THE JUDGES**

 

_ [20:30] Keep telling yourself that, sweetie _

 

**[20:33] yeah er**

 

**[20:34] i know it sounds stupid but could you please not be patronizing to me ? like i know this was a joke but**

 

_ [20:35] Message received I will process to not do that ever again _

 

**[20:35] thanks <3**

 

**[20:36] it’s just that**

 

**[20:38] when i was young and tried to tell people that my parents were treating me badly they usually thought that i was just overreacting because they punished me or something and like i was just one more child complaining so**

 

_ [20:39] I’m so sorry you went through this _

 

**[20:40] it’s okay**

 

**[20:40] you went through worse, you must think im just whining**

 

_ [20:41] No ! _

 

_ [20:42] Sirius you went through a lot too and you have every right to feel bad or to complain _

 

**[20:42] i guess ?**

 

**[20:43] thanks moony**

 

**[20:44] me and prongs are going to watch a movie together so goodnight sweetie <3**

 

_ [20:45] Have fun <3 _

 

March the 4th

 

_ [08:32] Do you prefer light brown or green ? _

 

**[10:43] why the hell were you awake this early**

 

**[10:45] green**

 

_ [18:37] Too late _

 

_ [18:38] I was choosing a sweater, FYI _

 

_ [18:38] Went with light brown _

 

**[18:39] well if you had told me i could have told you what suits you better**

 

_ [18:40] Well according to some sources brown “goes with my hair and makes me look hella hot” _

 

**[18:41] interesting information**

 

**[18:41] what sources ?**

 

_ [18:42] Fenrir, obviously _

 

**[18:42] should have guessed**

 

_ [18:43] We had a date today _

 

_ [18:44] He sacrificed his Saturday for me because of these stupid restrictions _

 

**[18:45] restrictions as in “not allowed to skip school whenever you want” ?**

 

_ [18:46] Yeah _

 

**[18:46] ow poor you your life is so difficult**

 

_ [18:47] Indeed _

 

**[18:48] what are you listening to ?**

 

_ [18:49] Wonderwall - Oasis _

 

_ [18:50] You ? _

 

**[18:51] take a big wild guess**

 

_ [18:53] Never Gonna Give You Up ? _

 

**[18:53] REMUS**

 

_ [18:54] You said wild _

 

_ [18:55] Search “Never Gonna Shoot Your Stars” on Youtube _

 

**[18:55] kay**

 

**[18:59] what have i watched**

 

_ [18:59] You made it to the end ? Wow _

 

**[19:00] at some point the video paralyzed me and i couldn’t close the tab**

 

**[19:01] brb gonna show this to james**

 

_ [19:02] Spread it. Soon it will infect the Earth and aliens will invade us _

 

**[19:02] good, maybe they are sexy**

 

_ [19:03] Is this seriously your first thought _

 

**[19:04] siriusly**

 

_ [19:05] Oh my god _

 

**[19:06] “sirius” will do just fine, thanks**

 

_ [19:07] You shut up right now _

 

**[19:08] NEVER**

 

_ [19:09] My parents are calling me for dinner, so you actually have to stop _

 

**[19:09] :(**

 

_ [19:10] Don’t give me that look _

 

_ [19:11] You are not allowed to say “i cant look at you were texting” _

 

**[19:12] but moony :(**

 

_ [19:13] For real though I have to go and eat _

 

**[19:14] kay, ttyl <3**

 

_ [19:15] <3 _

 

March the 5th

 

_ [13:24] I just realized my birthday would be the first day of the holidays _

 

**[13:25] five days remus !!!**

 

_ [13:25] You are more excited than me _

 

**[13:26] you should be way more excited !!!!!!!**

 

_ [13:27] I am excited ! But you are like a puppy who found a bone _

 

**[13:28] prongs does think i am actually a dog dressed up as an human**

 

_ [13:28] Prongs is wise _

 

**[13:29] prongs definitely isn’t. lily is the wise one**

 

_ [13:30] What about Regulus ? _

 

**[13:30] he’s the insufferable prat that we all love for some reason**

 

_ [13:31] Good role, I would say _

 

_ [13:32] Should I continue Big Bang Theory or start Brooklyn Nine Nine ? _

 

**[13:33] i thought you didnt like bbt ?**

 

_ [13:34] I don’t but I started it, might as well keep going _

 

**[13:35] moony you make no sense whatsoever**

 

**[13:36] watch brooklyn nine nine**

 

_ [13:36] I shall then. _

 

**[13:37] did you**

 

**[13:38] you**

 

**[13:39] what’s the**

 

**[13:40] nevermind**

 

_ [13:41] The episode is starting ! Ttyl <3 _

 

**[13:42] ttyl honey <3**

 

_ [18:12] Update : I love Rosa Diaz _

 

**[18:13] meh, not my fav**

 

**[18:14] she kind of bullies boyle**

 

_ [18:14] It’s not that bad _

 

**[18:15] agree to disagree**

 

_ [18:16] Oh well who’s your fav then ? _

 

**[18:17] captain holt**

 

**[18:17] my favorite gay in the universe**

 

**[18:18] you’re a close second**

 

_ [18:19] I am honored but as a bi I’m going to have to refuse this title _

 

**[18:20] oh well you’ll just have to stick to being my favorite bi.**

 

_ [18:21] Fine by me _

 

**[18:22] reg is going to get jealous**

 

_ [18:22] We should have a Bi Contest to see which of us is the best at being bi _

 

_ [18:23] What would the trials be ? _

 

**[18:23] dont look at me im gay**

 

_ [18:24] This sentence is perfect out of context _

 

**[18:25] I am perfect**

 

_ [18:25] Agree to disagree. _

 

**[18:26] wounded.**

 

March the 6th

 

**[07:23] and it’s monday agaiiiiiiiiiiiiiin**

 

_ [07:24] Cry, punk. _

 

**[07:24] complaining about school is punk**

 

_ [07:25] *Whining _

 

**[07:26] fuk u**

 

_ [07:27] Have a good day, honeypie ! _

 

**[07:28] i hope a piano falls on your pretty face**

 

_ [21:23] Wanna play Random Questions ? _

 

**[21:24] sure, classic rules ?**

 

_ [21:26] No asking for details or “same question”, allowed to ask for reformulations and to pass, no talking during the game ? _

 

**[21:26] works for me** .

 

_ [21:27] Favorite painter ? _

 

**[21:28] nerd. it’s jackson pollock. big spoon or little spoon ?**

 

_ [21:30] Big, but I rarely cuddle. Name of first teddy bear ? _

 

**[21:32] david. a quote you would like to share ?**

 

_ [21:36] “I’m a slave to my emotions, to my likes, to my hatred of boredom, to most of my desires.” - Fitzgerald. If you played an instrument ? _

 

**[21:38] i prefer singing but i guess the bass. last song you listened ?**

 

_ [21:39] Boys Don’t Cry - The Cure. Have you read The Full Spectrum ? _

 

**[21:42] only about a thousand times. a language you would like to learn ?**

 

_ [21:45] Ancient Greek. Do you fidget ? _

 

**[21:47] babe i’m the fidgeting king. favorite season ?**

 

_ [21:50] Autumn. Favorite meal ? _

 

**[21:53] anything mrs. potter cooks ( she’s james and I’s mum ). last movie you watched ?**

 

_ [21:56] Billy Eliott. Last thing you said to James ? _

 

**[22:01] “oi tosse, bring me s**

 

**[22:01] wait a sec**

 

_ [22:01] ? _

 

_ [22:02] Okay ? _

 

**[22:13] sorry but i can’t really talk tonight, bye**

 

_ [22:13] Bye ? Take care _

 

March the 7th

 

_ [12:23] What’s up ? _

 

**[12:28] hey ! sorry about yesterday, but i still can’t really talk. bye.**

 

_ [12:28] Kay, well ttyl <3 _

 

_ [19:45] Can you talk now ? _

 

**[19:49] no, sorry**

 

_ [19:50] Kay _

 

March the 8th

 

_ [17:39] Padfoot ? _

 

**[17:40] hi moony ! sorry about yesterday, felt a bit moody. but i’m better now !**

 

**[17:40] so what’s new ?**

 

_ [17:41] Will you please cut the act, Sirius ? _

 

**[17:41] what ?**

 

_ [17:42] You know what. You’re pretending everything’s fine. _

 

**[17:43] well maybe i dont want to talk**

 

_ [17:44] Okay, but did you tell James about it ? _

 

**[17:45] there is nothing to say**

 

_ [17:46] Okay well _

 

_ [17:46] I’m using one of my question : what’s wrong ? _

 

**[17:47] what ?**

 

**[17:48] that’s cheating !**

 

_ [17:49] That is the exact reason we got questions _

 

**[17:50] urgh**

 

**[17:55] reg called me and james last night and apparently our lovely parents heard that our cousin altair came out as a trans girl and after seeing her in a dress snogging a man, her parents disowned her and threw her in the street. reg managed to call her and apparently she is staying at her boyfriend’s, and she rather be called andromeda now. and our parents yelled for hours about how something was corrupting the black heirs ( nice reference to me ) and threatened reg that if he ever became like andromeda and me they would beat him up to death and believe me it isn’t an empty threat.**

 

_ [17:17] Fuck _

 

**[17:18] and everytime they say something like this ( though it was never this violent before ) reg gets scared and he avoids lily and james for a while**

 

_ [17:18] And not you ? _

 

**[17:18] of course me too**

 

_ [17:19] Okay _

 

_ [17:21] I’m gonna say it again, talk to James and Lily about it. They are your friends and understand what you’re feeling right now. And you can all support each other. _

 

**[17:22] i guess**

 

_ [17:23] Don’t let the bad feelings bottled up. I know it sounds like some stereotypical self help advice but it will makes things even worse. Trust me. _

 

**[17:24] yeah**

 

_ [17:15] And you can always talk to me when you feel like this, okay ? _

 

**[17:17] i know, but it’s so difficult**

 

_ [17:18] Trust me I know that. Getting someone’s attention on your struggle is so hard and sometimes it can lead you to do awful things _

 

_ [17:19] Like some people can’t say it aloud so they start to self harm or to take risks for themselves _

 

**[17:20] like stopping to eat ?**

 

**[17:20] sorry**

 

_ [17:21] Yeah, actually. _

 

**[17:22] sorry for bringing it up**

 

_ [17:23] It’s okay. I can talk about it with people I trust. _

 

_ [17:24] Anyway I’m not saying it’s what going to happen to you but I’m extra careful with these stuffs. _

 

**[17:25] yea**

 

**[17:26] thanks for talking to me, moony**

 

_ [17:27] You’re very welcome, Padfoot <3 _

 

March the 9th

 

**[07:35] TOMORROW REMUS**

 

_ [07:35] TOMORROW PADFOOT ! _

 

**[07:36] what should i give you ?**

 

_ [07:37] A giant TV and a trip to Brazil please _

 

**[07:38] im on it**

 

**[07:39] will you prefer a private jet or a cruise ship ?**

 

_ [07:40] Private cruise ship _

 

**[07:41] yes sir**

 

_ [07:42] I have to get ready for school, so have a good day ! <3 _

 

**[07:43] bye moony ! <3**

 

**[22:45] i can fit exactly 6 marshmallows in my mouth**

 

_ [22:46] Why exactly did you think I would be interested in this information _

 

**[22:46] because im handsome ?**

 

_ [22:47] I have no proof of that whatsoever _

 

_ [22:47]  i have long black hair, what else do you need to know ? _

 

_ [22:48] Idk, is your skin purple ? _

 

**[22:49] nope**

 

_ [22:50] Then you’re ugly as fuck _

 

**[22:50] ouch**

 

**[22:51] is YOUR skin purple ?**

 

_ [22:52] Obviously _

 

_ [22:52] All aces have purple skin _

 

**[22:53] i learnt today**

 

_ [22:54] I’m going to bed, so bye <3 _

 

**[22:55] sleep tight, moony. <3**

 

March the 10th

 

**[00:01] HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOONY**

 

_ [09:21] I AM OFFICIALLY SEVENTEEN _

 

**[09:22] HAPPY BIRTHDAY**

 

_ [09:23] THANK YOU PADFOOT _

 

_ [09:23] I ACTUALLY HAVE TO HURRY I HAVE A BDAY DATE WITH FENRIR _

 

**[09:24] OFF TO LOVE YOU GO**

 

_ [09:53] On my way to the date, I am officially walking at the Rhythm Of Love _

 

**[09:54] poetic**

 

_ [09:55] Lol no I am walking while listening to the Rhythm Of Love by Plain White T’s _

 

**[09:56] and here i thought you were a romantic**

 

_ [09:59] sirius _

 

_ [09:59] do you have a crush on me _

 

**[10:00] what the hell**

 

_ [10:00] just answer the goddamn question sirius _

 

**[10:01] moony what the hell is happening**

 

_ [10:01] WILL YOU JUST FUCKING ANSWER _

 

**[10:02] why are being so aggressive ?????**

 

_ [10:02] WHY ARE YOU AVOIDING THE QUESTION _

 

**[10:03] YES I DO OKAY**

 

**[10:04] ARE YOU HAPPY NOW**

 

_ [10:05] never message me again. _

 

**[10:06] WHAT THE HELL MOONY**

 

**[10:07] SHOULDN’T HAVE ASKED IF YOU DIDN’T WANT THE TRUTH**

  
*This number blocked you. You can’t send them any message or call them.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehehe, i am evil. feel free to hate me.
> 
> i absolutely wanted to include trans!andromeda in one of my works so i can die happy now.


	7. Forgiveness ?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus manages to explain things to Sirius

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright here it is sorry for the waiting ! ( and also how short it is )
> 
> thanks to my beta NachoDiablo, you should totally check out her fics bc she is an awesome writer
> 
> this was really hard to write, plus it's exam times so there is more stress but i will attempt to write the next chapter soon

Sirius Black was walking home with their headphones blasting  _ London Calling _ at the maximum volume. They had just gotten out of an  exhausting therapy session and wanted nothing more than to go out at some bar and drink as much as they could afford, but they had already done that two days ago and they did not want to be killed by Euphemia Potter.  _ Saturday _ , they thought,  _ it will be safe to go.  _

 

Sirius did not have the best coping mechanisms - that was one of the reasons they were in therapy, actually. They would drink or do reckless things to hurt themselves , physically and mentally. That was how, barely a year ago, they had ended up covered in bruises and cuts on the Potter’s doorstep. That was how they almost got expelled from Hogwarts after  they heard about Alphard being disowned. And that was what they were fighting right now as a small voice whispered in the back of their head that they would feel so much better once they punched a stranger in the face for no other reason  than not liking the look of them.

 

It had been a week since their last conversation with Remus. After receiving the text-we-do-not-talk-about, they had started to punch their wall with so much force their knuckles had started to bleed. Had it not been for James, they could have continued for hours. They had done so, in the past, after being beaten or yelled at by their parents.

 

It just hurt so much, the rejection. Sirius had never, ever planned on confessing their feelings to Remus, but the boy had been so insistent that they just had to. And then it all went to hell, and James had to hold them because they would either cry for hours or do stupid, dangerous things to themselves. They knew it was stupid, that they hadn’t known each other for  very long, but if there was one thing Sirius Black hated more than anything, it was rejection. His therapist made them work on that, but it would take a long time to change something so deeply ingrained in them.

 

They were  thinking - or rather, trying to pretend they weren’t thinking - about all of this when the song switched to something by AC/DC and all the memories of the stupid puns they made about Remus’s asexuality came back to them. The urge to do something reckless was getting stronger and Sirius felt their hands forming fists and God they needed the relief so badly when suddenly their train of thought got interrupted.

 

Just in front of the Potter’s house, they could see the silhouette of someone pacing nervously. The stranger seemed rather masculine, tall, with curly hair - Sirius couldn’t see much, the  light was fading . They approached to see if the person was lost or needed help with something.

 

“Hi? Excuse me, can I help you somehow?” they asked, while walking to the  stranger . “You seemed concerned.”

 

The stranger turned to them, and Sirius got a very, very bad feeling about all of this. They were about Sirius’s ag e, very thin with hazel eyes, and they seemed to be terrified of the young teen. They cleared their throat and asked :

 

“Is this - I mean, er… Are you…” they took a deep breathe and tried again. “Are you Sirius Black ?”

 

Sirius felt a premonition forming in the back of their head. They didn’t like where this was going. “Yeah. Who are you?”

 

The stranger nodded, looking away. “I’m Remus.”

 

* * *

 

Remus knew this was a bad idea all along, but it was too late to go back. As soon as he saw them walking  over , he recognized them, despite never seeing them before. Long dark hair, leather jacket, Asian - probably Thai or maybe Japanese, he thought -, incredibly attractive, it just had to be Sirius.

 

After he had introduced himself, Sirius had looked shocked and hadn’t answered. He had rehearsed a speech yesterday in front of his mirror, but all his words seemed pretentious and useless now. He wanted to run, he needed to run, this wasn’t good and Fenrir would be so mad at him if he knew, and the thought alone made him shiver.

 

“So” Sirius stared at him with anger and hurt. “Do what do I owe the pleasure of this visit ?”

 

Their sarcasm was obvious, and they crossed their arms in defiance. This was going to be tough.

 

“I found your address based on the Potter’s last name. And I decided to wait for you here. Your, er, dad, was beginning to get worried. I think.”

 

Sirius nodded wordlessly. “You hadn’t answered the question.”

 

“I wanted to explain”, he tried. “On my birthday, what happened. It’s, it’s not what you think.”

 

“Oh really? Because by the look of it, it seems that after weeks of being mad at me for prying, you forced me to admit my -”, they hesitated for the word, “- feelings for you, then got mad at me and cut me out of your life.”

 

Remus didn’t expect that much anger from the black haired teen. He knew they must feel bad, but he didn’t know they were that affected. He felt guilty and once again tried to refrain himself from running away.

 

“Yeah, well. This isn’t exactly what happened. Can you - can you please hear me out?” He looked at his friend with what he hoped  were pleading eyes.

 

Sirius weakly smiled. “I’m still  here , ain’t I ?”

 

“Good.” he gulped. “Okay well as you know, on my birthday I was going to go out with Fenrir. But I was texting you, you remember, as I was waiting for him and I didn’t see him coming. He, er, saw the texts, and as I usually don’t text a lot of people besides him and my parents he was curious and he saw  our last messages. They looked a bit-” He paused. “- flirty, I guess.”

 

He stopped to watch Sirius’s reaction to his story so far, but they were still perfectly unresponsive.

 

“Anyway, he got mad. So he took my phone and messaged you to ask how you felt about me, and he got mad that you were, I don’t know, denying it? I don’t know what he wanted, but when you told him that you liked me-” he tried not to stutter on the words, “he became even more angry and he sent you the text and he erased our convo and blocked your number. Then he gave me my phone back and left.”

 

He had carefully “forgotten ” to mention the argument that had followed. That wasn’t relevant to the story. He stared at his friend, silently begging them to say something, anything.

 

“And you didn’t text me after that?”

 

Better than nothing, Remus thought. “I couldn’t, your contact and our texts were deleted. I had no way of getting your number again. That’s why I had to look for the Potter’s house.”

 

Sirius nodded absently. “And you didn’t stop him.”

 

Remus froze. He didn’t even consider it, trying to stop Fenrir. It had never turned out well for anyone.

 

“You just watched him doing it and said nothing?” they insisted.

 

“No, I-, I tried to explain! But he was so angry, he ignored me.”

 

Sirius sighed. “So what now? Did you two break up?”

 

“No!” Remus didn’t expect that question. “He was mad, but he didn’t dump me.”

 

“What about  _ you  _ ?” Sirius all but screamed. “Weren’t you mad?”

 

Remus  shook his head no, a bit taken aback by Sirius’s sudden anger. “He had every right to be mad. He had just planned me a great birthday date and he took out his savings to get me a present and he sees me flirting with a stranger who admits  to having a crush on me.”

 

Sirius almost growled, and Remus took a step back. But the teen turned his head away and muttered something to themselves.

 

“I can’t do this right now, okay?” they said. “I’m sorry, I’m tired and I need to go home and God, I’m glad you explained but… Not right now. Just give me your phone for a minute.”

 

Remus obligated and after a minute of scrolling and frowning and typing, they gave it back.

 

“I unblocked myself and added my number. I’ll text you. Tomorrow, or -  sometime .” He paused, and added, “Thanks for explaining.”

 

Before Remus had time to say anything, Sirius had turned away and slammed the door to their house. It had  gone slightly better than he  had expected. He hadn’t been yelled at, and Sirius had listened to him  the whole time . He tried to ignore the voice in his head comparing their reaction to Fenrir’s. Some things were better left ignored.

 

* * *

 

March the 18th

 

[19:35] Sirius where are you ?

 

**[19:36] out**

 

[19:36] Mum is worried sick

 

**[19:37] tell her i’ll be back tonight**

 

[19:38] You know it’s only gonna make her more worried

 

**[19:39] well its the truth**

 

[19:40] What are you even doing

 

**[19:40] walking around**

 

[19:41] Aimlessly ?

 

**[19:42] yes**

 

[19:43] You can sulk about remus inside you know

 

**[19:44] christ it’s not like its the first time im going out on a saturday evening what’s the big deal ?**

 

[19:45] Idk maybe that you’re alone and last time that happened you came home with bloody knuckles ?

 

**[19:46] im mad at everyone leave me alone**

 

[19:46] Cant you just tell me about it ?

 

**[19:47] i already told you**

 

[19:48] I mean tell me what is upsetting you so much about what happened

 

**[19:48] i hate being ignored and you know it**

 

[19:49] Yeah but it already happened once or twice because i was hanging out with reg and lils too often and you forgave me pretty quick, so what’s the difference now ?

 

**[19:50] he didnt do anything to stop his boyfriend**

 

[19:53] Didn’t do ANYTHING ? the guy tracked us to find your address to talk and explain and waited for you in the cold even though his boyfriend would probably kill him if he knew ! he was too scared to oppose him when he was there, but he broke his “rules” by looking for you ! he’s just afraid, and fear can make people do terrible things.

 

**[19:54] …**

 

**[19:54] i guess**

 

**[19:55] but i cant help feeling hurt, you know ?**

 

[19:56] That’s understandable. But please dont hate remus for this. The guy has a lot to put up with.

 

**[19:57] i could never hate him**

 

[19:58] Good. Will you come home now?

 

**[19:59] i guess**

  
[19:59] good


	8. Boundaries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They kiss and make up, but new drama is just around the corner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warnings for talking about abuse, mentions of anorexia and fatphobia ( nothing deep ) and panic attacks
> 
> also i mention a spinner at some point and i want to make clear that it is used as a medical device by someone who needs it and not a toy.
> 
> i tried to include a pic and failed. nice.
> 
> also i stayed up way too late to finish this shit which is a mess anyway but a gurl has to update so fuk it

March the 20th

 

**[17:12] hey**

 

_ [17:15] Sirius ! _

 

_ [17:15] Can you please please wait just like ten minutes before we talk ? _

 

**[17:16] you waited three days for my answer, so yeah of course i can**

 

_ [17:16] Thank you _

 

_ [17:26] Are you still there ? _

 

**[17:27] yeah i am. what were you doing ?**

 

_ [17:27] I was with Fenrir. But I left. _

 

**[17:28] okay. he isnt mad or anything ?**

 

_ [17:29] Upset, but I’ll make it up to him. _

 

_ [17:30] So… _

 

**[17:31] im sorry**

 

**[17:33] you worked hard to try to find me and i should have at least thank you for that**

 

_ [17:34] You don’t need to be, I’m the one who’s sorry for all of this. _

 

**[17:35] it doesnt matter okay ? can we just forget about all of this ?**

 

_ [17:36] Yeah but _

 

_ [17:36] Can i set some sort of boundaries ? _

 

_ [17:37] Forget it it’s stupid _

 

**[17:38] no of course you can go ahead**

 

_ [17:39] Alright _

 

_ [17:40] Can we avoid the subject of my relationship for now on ? And you know, stop with all the love jokes ? _

 

**[17:42] alright**

 

_ [17:43] So, we’re good ? _

 

**[17:44] we’re good**

 

* * *

 

 

March the 21th

 

**[09:56] fridays are cruel. i already went to school for for days, why do they insist on adding a fifth one to that ?**

 

_ [09:57] Aw you poor thing. Life is so tough. _

 

**[09:58] i know you were being sarcastic but i am going to take it as genuine support.**

 

_ [09:58] Sure you do you _

 

**[09:59] also i’m sat next to prongs who is texting reg and is all soppy**

 

_ [10:00] Alright, for that I will give my compassion _

 

**[10:01] appreciated**

 

**[10:01] my brother is hitting on my brother. i hate my life.**

 

_ [10:02] Btw how is Reg doing ? _

 

**[10:04] as much as i can say, he’s okay. i dont think they are too bad at the moment and he hangs out with us more. if everything goes as planned we might even have a sleepover at the potters saturday ( he’ll tell them he’s going at barty’s or something )**

 

**[10:05] barty being one of the people our biological parents would want him to be friend with**

 

_ [10:05] Not afraid you’ll be the fourth wheel ? _

 

**[10:06] i’ll bring popcorn and will throw it at them if they so much as hold hands**

 

_ [10:07] You are going to waste perfectly good popcorn _

 

**[10:08] okay new plan : i bring salty popcorn for me to eat and sugary popcorn as munitions bc sugary popcorns shouldn’t even exist**

 

_ [10:08] Are you kidding me sugar popcorn is far better ? _

 

**[10:09] how tHe HEll CaN YOu SAy thAt**

 

_ [10:10] Drama queen _

 

**[10:10] you are insulting food**

 

**[10:11] i cant speak to you anymore**

 

_ [10:11] :( _

 

**[10:12] uuurgh dont give me that look**

 

_ [10:13] Then stop insulting my taste in food _

 

**[10:14] fine. but im pouting here.**

 

**[10:15] and james is making fun of me.**

 

_ [10:16] Am I supposed to feel sorry for you ? _

 

**[10:16] absolutely. im hurt, moony !**

 

_ [10:17]  _ _ ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ _

 

**[10:18] mean.**

 

* * *

 

 

**[21:34] i forgot to ask, did you keep watching brooklyn nine nine ?**

 

_ [21:35] I didn’t have any time this week but now that you mention it, I’m going to watch it right now _

 

**[21:35] are you still a fan of rosa ?**

 

_ [21:36] I love her and Terry equally _

 

**[21:37] oh my god yes terry**

 

**[21:38] he is the best character ever**

 

**[21:38] after holt**

 

**[21:39] love me a man who can pick me up the ground with only one of his muscular arms**

 

_ [21:40] You are such a bottom _

 

**[21:41] guilty as charged.**

 

_ [21:42] Also it’s not that hard to pick you up, you’re tiny _

 

_ [21:43] Even I could do it _

 

**[21:44] oi**

 

**[21:45] i might be small but i’m strong enough to break your shinbone**

 

_ [21:46] Tbh that’s very likely. I have shitty bones. _

 

_ [21:47] I broke my arm twice and my wrist three times _ .

 

**[21:48] how ??? is ??? this ??? even ??? possible ???**

 

_ [21:49] Well I was too young to remember the first wrist one _

 

**[21:50] that is not reassuring at all.**

 

_ [21:51] Well what can I say ? I am clumsy and weak. _

 

**[21:52] i broke my hip once but i think that’s all**

 

**[21:53] well i didn’t break my hip someone broke my hip**

 

**[21:53] but same result**

 

_ [21:54] How did this even happened ? _

 

**[21:55] my dad was drunk and pushed me down the stairs**

 

_ [21:55] Oh. _

 

_ [21:55] Sorry _

 

**[21:56] it’s okay. i’m not bothered talking about it.**

 

**[21:57] james wants my attention tho ( poor guy thinks he can beat me at mario kart ) so bye moony !**

 

_ [21:58] I’m rooting for you ! _

 

* * *

 

 

March the 22th

 

**[13:45] give me an idea for something to draw**

 

_ [13:46] Oh _

 

_ [13:46] What kind of stuffs ? _

 

**[13:46] as long as it can be drawn on a normal size page, anything**

 

_ [13:47] Alright _

 

_ [13:49] Draw a maze _

 

**[13:50] okay im on it. thanks !**

 

_ [13:50] You’re welcome ! _

 

* * *

 

 

**[16:04] ( pic )**

 

_ [16:05] Oh wow _

 

**[16:06] you like it ?**

 

_ [16:06] I love it _

 

**[16:06] ha thanks**

 

_ [16:07] Wait _

 

_ [16:09] Found the way ! _

 

**[16:10] so you really like it ?**

 

_ [16:11] Of course I do ? _

 

_ [16:11] I just told you so ? _

 

**[16:12] yeah right**

 

**[16:13] sorry i can be pretty insecure about showing my drawings to anyone**

 

_ [16:14] Well you can relax because it’s really beautiful _

 

**[16:15] thank you remus**

 

**[16:16] so what are you doing today ?**

 

[ _ 16:16] Uuuuurgh I’m writing an essay for monday _

 

**[16:17] ouch :(**

 

_ [16:17] You ? _

 

**[16:17] reg is coming in less than 2 hours and until then idk**

 

_ [16:18] Is Lily there already ? _

 

**[16:18] yeah she’s playing cards with james ( nerds )**

 

_ [16:19] And you aren’t ? _

 

**[16:19] i’ll join them soon but i was too busy before with the drawing and scrolling through insta**

 

_ [16:20] Priorities _

 

**[16:20] okay they are actually asking for me to grace them with my presence**

 

**[16:21] ttyl !**

 

_ [16:22] Bye, have fun ! _

 

* * *

 

 

**[20:21] Hey mate you’re here ?**

 

_ [20:21] Yes ? _

 

**[20:22] Awesome**

 

**[20:22] Sirius felt asleep during the first movie ( what a weak ass ) and we stole their phone**

 

**[20:22] And by “we” i mean i did and reg and lily did nothing to stop me**

 

_ [20:23] Oooookay am I in trouble ? _

 

**[20:24] What ? No of course**

 

**[20:25] We just thought you might like some embarrassing stories**

 

_ [20:25] Oh ! Yes then I definitely want some _

 

_ [20:26] I mean if it doesn’t upset them _

 

**[20:26] Nah it wont**

 

**[20:27] So they told you about our amazing teacher who was incredibly supportive of them and made everyone use their correct pronouns ?**

 

_ [20:27] Yeah ? _

 

**[20:28] They called her mum WAY MORE THAN ONCE**

 

_ [20:29] Oh my god _

 

_ [20:30] Was she kind about it ? _

 

**[20:30] She teared up when they did it for the first time.**

 

_ [20:31] Oh my god I love this _

 

**[20:32] Also they grew up, as you know, super posh, so when we took the bus together for the first time they went to the driver and asked them to drop us in front of the mall**

 

_ [20:32] This is amazing _

 

**[20:33] And le**

 

_ [20:34] James ? _

 

**[20:34] james is dead. i killed him. be right back i need to kill regulus and lily for laughing to this**

 

_ [20:35] Alright have fun, posh boy _

 

* * *

 

 

**[01:34] goodnight moony**

 

* * *

 

 

March the 23th

 

[12:04] Mate where the hell are u?

 

**[12:05] hanging out with marlene. some of us wake up before midday**

 

[12:05] Lies

 

**[12:06] how are reg and lily?**

 

[12:07] Reg had been awake for hours and have been busy eating everything edible in the house and lily is still asleep

 

[12:08] So what are you and marl doing ?

 

**[12:08] watching the simpsons on her couch**

 

**[12:09] and talking bout stuffs**

 

**[12:11] ths is marl and “stuffs” is code for “ranting bout Mysterious Text Boi for HOURS” please come here and take them back to your place**

 

[12:11] they arent nearly as smooth as they think they are

 

**[12:12] THIS IS SIRIUS AND YOU SIR ARE A TRAITOR**

 

[12:13] How did i betray you exactly ?

 

**[12:14] you were supposed to take my side and tell her she was being an asshole but noooo**

 

[12:15] When have i ever taken your side against marlene ?

 

**[12:16] what did i do to get a brother like you**

 

[12:16] Do you really expect a list because dude i can give you one

 

[12:17] But more importantly

 

[12:18] You have to get over that guy, mate. You know it’s not happening. He has a bf

 

**[12:20] first of all i never said i wanted to be with him and secondly his bf is an abusive asshole**

 

[12:21] True but that doesnt change a thing. Actually if they - as i wish they do - break up, it might be even more difficult for him to feel comfortable in a relationship again at least for a while

 

[12:22] I’m not trying to upset you i just dont want you to think you’re gonna save the guy then get with him bc he is just so thankful that you rescued him. Bc that wont happen.

 

**[12:23] i know, i’m not stupid**

 

[12:24] You’re not stupid, but you do get impulsive when you are emotional and i just want to protect you.

 

**[12:25] oh so you want to protect me but im the one with a savior syndrome ?**

 

[12:25] This is not what i’m saying and you know it padfoot.

 

**[12:26] whatever. this conversation is over. thanks for ruining me having a nice time with a friend james.**

 

[12:27] Sirius please don’t be mad

 

[12:31] Ignore me all you want but you know i’m right.

 

* * *

 

 

_ [15:36] What’s up ? _

 

**[15:37] urgh.**

 

_ [15:37] Urgh ? _

 

**[15:37] urgh.**

 

_ [15:38] What happened ? _

 

**[15:39] i had a fight with prongs about something unimportant. nevermind that. how are you ?**

 

_ [15:39] I’m fine. Wanna talk about it ? _

 

**[15:39] it’s just. he brought something i prefer to ignore.**

 

**[15:40] and he didnt exactly formulated it kindly** .

 

_ [15:40] I’m sorry :/ I’m sure he meant no harm and he’ll apologize _

 

**[15:41] he better. so what’s up for you ?**

 

_ [15:42] I started to feel anxious about school this morning because we have a big exam in coming and I missed so many classes so I am currently taking a relaxing Lush bath _

 

**[15:44] nice**

 

**[15:45] but i’m sure it will go well**

 

_ [15:45] We’ll see _

 

* * *

 

 

**[19:53] sorry i didn’t answer you before but some drama is happening right now and i was busy**

 

_ [19:54] No problem ! Did something bad happen ? _

 

**[19:56] my biological mother discovered that reg’s sleepover at barty’s was a lie bc she saw him and his father at church this morning**

 

_ [19:57] Fuck _

 

_ [19:57] What happened ? _

 

**[19:58] he told us he was going to pretend to have been with a secret girlfriend but he went to see them hours ago and is still not answering our texts**

 

_ [19:58] Fuck fuck fuck _

 

_ [19:59] What are you three doing right now ? _

 

**[20:00] lily and james are going at her place to take her stuff for tomorrow at school bc she doesn’t feel like spending the night alone.**

 

_ [20:01] And you ? _

 

**[20:02] i’m just texting you in my bedroom with a bit of music to calm me down**

 

_ [20:02] Good. Wanna talk about it ? Or to think about something else ? _

 

**[20:03] i dunno. i’m just worried.**

 

**[20:05] i know what my parents are capable of with me but they never did anything more than yelling to reg. also he is super sensitive and what i was able to resist will definitely be too much for him.**

 

**[20:06] it just sucks that i have no idea what’s happening**

 

_ [20:07] Sirius I know it’s hard but you have to try not to think of the absolute worst. Dance to your music, stay with James and Lily when they will be back. Thinking about the worst isn’t helping anyone. _

 

**[20:07] i c a n t stop thinking about it.**

 

_ [20:08] I know, but you have to at least try. Do you have anything to distract you ? _

 

**[20:09] i have my spinner ?**

 

_ [20:09] Good. Use that to stay grounded. _

 

**[20:09] okay. okay.**

 

**[20:10] i’m going to go, okay ?**

 

_ [20:11] Alright. Take care of yourself and text me as soon as you have answers alright ? _

 

**[20:12] will.**

 

* * *

 

 

March the 24th

 

**[09:13] update : reg is at school and avoiding us.**

 

**[09:14] like every time one of us gets close to him he goes away without a word.**

 

**[09:14] also i’m pretty sure i saw bruises on his arm.**

 

* * *

 

 

_ [11:47] I’m so sorry I wasn’t on my phone ! Did anything new happened ? _

 

**[11:48] no**

 

_ [11:49] Where are you right now ? Are you in a calm place ? How are you feeling ? _

 

**[11:50] i’m in the hospital wing**

 

**[11:50] i had a panic attack**

 

_ [11:51] Is it over now ? _

 

**[11:52] yeah. our nurse is amazing and can help with anything.**

 

_ [11:53] I’m glad you’re calm and in a safe location. If it’s all too much, ask the Potters to say at home for a while okay ? _

 

_ [11:53] How are James and Lily holding up ? _

 

**[11:54] better than me but still worked up. this morning james cried when he found reg’s toothbrush in our bathroom.**

 

_ [11:55] You guys have to stick together. _

 

**[11:55] we will.**

 

**[11:56] make me think of something else**

 

_ [11:57] Like what ? _

 

**[11:57] idk**

 

**[11:57] tell me about peter**

 

_ [12:00] He is super smart but not school smart, so he always gets bad grades. He is a great listener. He doesn’t get sarcasm. He’s aroace. He’s super insecure. He loves chess. He quotes poems. He cooks. He sent me a text for my birthday. He knits. He can be brave if it means supporting someone he cares about. He is terrible at folding airplanes. He gets a lot of shit for being fat but still listened to me when I complained about being too fat when I was at the rock bottom of my anorexia ( and then tried to make me feel better ). He really likes cheese. _

 

**[12:01] he sounds like an amazing person.**

 

_ [12:01] I know. I’m starting to feel I shouldn’t cut him off like I did. _

 

_ [12:02] Especially after his text for my birthday _ .

 

[ **12:02] you should talk to him again**

 

_ [12:03] Maybe. _

 

_ [12:17] Sirius ? _

 

**[12:24] shit sorry moony i**

 

**[12:24] regulus just showed up in the hospital wing to see me**

 

_ [12:25] Oh _

 

_ [12:25] What did he say ? _

 

**[12:27] that he was sorry i got a panic attack over this and told me that our parents yelled a lot about him lying but bought the secret girlfriend lie. he denied that they were violent but i saw him from closer and he definitely has bruises**

 

_ [12:27] Are you alright ? _

 

**[12:28] pretty shaken up. i’ll be alright tho. just gonna lie down.**

 

_ [12:29] Take care, okay ? I love you <3 _

 

**[12:30] thanks moony i love you too <3**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> advice for anyone who ever wants to write a text fic : write down everything that person A knows about person B and person B about person A on a different doc so you dont spend half an hour rereading your fic to see if you mentioned said info already.
> 
> thanks for reading !
> 
> also credit goes to donnarafiki for the sirius calling a teacher mom joke ! they are awesome !


	9. Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A revelation...
> 
> Texting between Remus and Fenrir

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what ? an update ? after all this time ? always !
> 
> sorry for the wait, my mental health got crappy for a while, but i am back !
> 
> there are things i love with this chapter, things i dislike, but i will most certainly edit once i'm on my laptop and not my phone
> 
>  
> 
> more and more trigger warnings for abuse and misgendering

March the 25th

 

[17:43] what are you doing

 

_ [17:44] Just some reading. For school. You ? _

 

[17:44] watching some stupid show on the telly. wish i could get netflix

 

[17:45] so what are you reading ?

 

_ [17:46] Pride and Prejudice. You ever read it ? _

 

[17:46] saw the movie. it sucked

 

[17:47] elizabeth annoys me

 

_ [17:47] Yeah I can see why. She’s so stubborn on everything _

 

[17:48] also so uptight with everyone like she always knows better and she treated the other guy like crap

 

_ [17:49] Yeah I hate her too. Anyway how was your day ? _

[17:50] pretty shitty. had to go and ask my dad for money. you know how much i hate this

 

_ [17:50] I’m sorry. Anyway I can help ? _

 

[17:51] come over tomorrow ? i need to relax

 

_ [17:52] Okay. Do I bring lunch ? _

 

[17:52] remus it’s like you dont know me obviously youre bringing lunch

 

_ [17:53] sorry _

 

[17:54] honestly

 

[17:55] anyway call you later

 

-

 

[09:21] cant wait to see you today!

 

_ [09:22] Me neither ! I love you _

 

[09:22] i love you too

 

-

 

[19:01] already came home ?

 

_ [19:02] Hmm, no, I’m just hanging out in the park for now. The light is nice. _

 

[19:02] on your own ?

 

_ [19:03] Yeah, of course ! _

 

[19:04] babe, that’s a bit worrying. i dont want some weirdo to come hitting on you and make you feel uncomfortable

 

_ [19:05] It’s okay, it’s just 7pm. No one is drunk yet _

 

[19:05] trust me, the guys can be pretty insistent.

 

[19:06] i just dont want you to be hurt

 

_ [19:07] I know. But I swear I haven’t seen anyone drunk or flirty, and even if they were you know I wouldn’t cheat _

 

[19:08] yeah right. do i have to remind you of the whole deal of you actually going out with that other boy behind my back ?

 

_ [19:09] We weren’t going out together, I didn’t know they had a crush on me and Sirius isn’t a boy _

 

[19:09] whatever

 

[19:10] you know i have trust issues since my last boyfriend cheated on me and it wasnt even the point

 

_ [19:11] I know, I’m sorry _

 

_ [19:12] I’ll just head home _

 

[19:12] i love you

 

_ [19:12] I love you too _

 

-

 

March the 26th

 

[09:23] btw we have to start organizing you moving in with me

 

[09:23] we said you would at the end of the year

 

[09:24] you have to find a way to pay the rent and stuffs

 

[09:25] nice to be ignored

 

_ [09:26] Sorry sorry I was doing the dishes ! _

 

[09:26] nevermind

 

_ [09:27] I’m really sorry _

 

_ [09:27] I’m going to look into it _

 

_ [09:28] I’ll let you know _

 

-

 

[13:45] wyd ?

 

_ [13:46] Homeworks _

 

_ [13:46] You ? _

 

[13:47] going to see a friend

 

_ [13:47] That’s cool ! Do I know them ? _

 

[13:48] nah, he’s a bloke i met at a pub the other night

 

_ [13:49] Okay, have fun ! _

 

[13:50] bye

 

-

 

[19:28] are you free tomorrow afternoon ?

 

_ [19:29] My classes end at 4pm, and after that I am ! _

 

[19:29] that’s cool we can crash at mine

 

[19:30] we havent watched an indiana jones in such a long time, wanna do that ?

 

_ [19:31] Yesssss great idea ! _

 

_ [19:32] Do you have the paprika chips ? We can’t watch it without them _

 

[19:32] dont have any let, ill buy some

 

_ [19:33] It’s gonna be amazing ! _

 

[19:34] i have to make a call, but i love you, okay ?

 

_ [19:35] I love you too _

 

-

 

March the 27th

 

[07:47] have a good day until tonight :)

 

_ [07:48] You too ! _

 

-

 

[16:02] so where are you ?

 

[16:05] im waiting fyi

 

[16:09] okay nevermind

 

_ [16:21] I’m right there ! Sorry I was in the tube _

 

[16:22] you’re like 25 minutes late

 

_ [16:23] What ? What do you mean? _

 

[16:24] you said you’ll be there at 4pm

 

[16:25] what no it was when

 

[16:25] i’m at your front door let me in please ill explain

 

-

 

March the 27th

 

[02:45] rem ?

 

[02:46] what are u doing 

 

[02:46] why arent you answering

 

[02:47] oh right

 

[02:48] youll just read this in the morning i guess

 

[02:49] anyway im sorry about yesterday

 

[02:50] i overreacted

 

[02:52] i know i said it before, but you know how much im worried that you are going to leave me for someone else bc we’re just so different, even if were both making efforts to find common interests. i guess im just really scared youll think its not worth it

 

[02:53] i dont want you to. it would kill me if you left me.

 

[02:54] i cant imagine my life without you anymore

 

-

 

_ [07:36] wow th _

 

_ [07:37] that was a lot _

 

_ [07:37] thanks for apologizing, and i’m very sorry too _

 

_ [07:38] im not leaving you ever, dont worry <3 _

 

-

 

[09:58] thank you

 

[09:58] wow we both went a little overboard with this right ?

 

[09:59] but now were fine and that's what matters

 

_ [10:02] Yeah it's all fine _

 

_ [10:03] So… Should we plan a new Indiana Jones night ? :) _

 

[10:03] whenever you want babe

 

_ [10:04] Awesome ! _

 

_ [10:05] I'll call you later so we can organize that, okay ? _

 

[10:06] sure ! have a great day :)

 

_ [10:07] :) _

 

-

 

March the 28th

 

[08:36] hey babe! 

 

_ [08:37] Hhey _

 

_ [08:37] *hey _

 

_ [08:38] Whast up _

 

[08:39] hey, what's wrong ?

 

_ [08:40] it's nothing _

 

[08:40] you know you can talk to me right?

 

_ [08:41] it's okay _

 

_ [08:42] i'm koay _

 

_ [08:42] *okay _

 

[08:43] well if you dont want to talk to me go ahead i guess

 

_ [08:43] no it's not about you _

 

[08:44] urgh im sorry

 

[08:45] you know its my insecurities again

 

[08:46] but im sorry, if you dont think you can talk to me i can see why

 

_ [08:46] no dont worry it's not _

 

_ [08:47] actually no _

 

_ [08:48] i just asked you not to make it about you and you do this  _

 

_ [08:48] so obviously no, i cant talk to you about it _

 

_ [08:49] i'm just gonna go talk about it with someone else _

 

_ [08:50] bye fenrir _

 

-

 

Remus was walking, for once, without any music in his earbuds. He usually hated it, but he felt too anxious right now. He was getting closer and closer to Fenrir’s place and, while he knew Fenrir wouldn’t hit him, he couldn't help but feel a knot in his stomach.

 

His boyfriend had never returned his calls and texts after their fight this morning. Sirius had advised to wait for him to apologize, but he didn't know Fenrir. It would be better for everybody if Remus went himself.

 

It was already a bit late, the sun getting close to the horizon line. Hopefully Remus’ parents were never too curious about his whereabouts, which allowed him a great deal of liberty.

 

As he finally reached the heavy door of Fenrir’s building, anxiety filled his entire body. He felt ready to pass out - an experience he wasn't thrilled of reliving.

 

Yet he took a minute to do one of his breathing exercise, reached in his bag for the bottle of perfume that never failed to ground him, and entered the dark corridor that would lead him to his final destination.

 

He knocked four times.

 

No one answered.

 

This wasn't unusual, he reminded himself. He had a key for these situations.

 

He stepped in the apartment. Fenrir was probably in his bedroom. Remus shivered. He hated this bedroom, even if he had never figured out why.

 

The door was closed.

 

Remus opened it.

 

***

 

Calling : Moony <3

 

**“Hi ! What's up ?”**

 

_ “Sirius ? Did I bother you ? I’m sorry I should have asked first but…” _

 

**“Hey, keep calm, Moony, it's okay, I wasn't doing anything. What is happening ?”**

 

_ “It’s stupid, I shouldn't bother you with this but…” _

 

**“Not a bother. Tell me. You sound terrified.”**

 

_ “I went to Fenrir's, like I told you and well, he didn’t expect me to, I think and… Sorry I’m rambling. It’s complicated…” _

 

**“Can I… Can I make this easier for you ?”**

 

_ “Can you please… not get angry when I tell you ?” _

 

**“I promise.”**

 

_ “Okay. Well. I went to see Fenrir and when I saw him he was…” _

 

**“Moony, breathe. It’s okay. You're safe.”**

 

_ “I know. I know. He was… having sex with someone.” _

 

**“...”**

 

_ “Padfoot ?” _

 

**“I’m here. So what happened ?”**

 

_ “He… got angry with me. I ran off. I’m at a park. I can't go home. He’ll… He'll find me.” _

 

**“What happens if he finds you ?”**

 

_ “I… I dunno, my parents aren't there and… I don't know, I don't want to…” _

 

**“Okay, okay, something else. When will your parents come back ?”**

 

_ “In two days.” _

 

**“Alright. Do you want to come over at my place ?”**

 

_ “I can't, I… I don't even know your family and you live far from here and I can't be somewhere so unfamiliar right now.” _

 

**“Okay, do you have anywhere else ?”**

 

_ “I… Maybe.” _

 

**“Maybe ?”**

 

_ “I can try… But… Peter’s house isn't very far away and… Do you think I should try ?” _

 

**“Yes ! Yes, yes, absolutely ! Just, go anywhere safe. Please.”**

 

_ “I can try… I’ll try. Call you back, alright ?” _

 

**“Okay. Okay. Let me know how it goes.”**

 

_ “Yeah. Alright. Bye ?” _

 

**“Bye Moony. Good luck.”**

  
Call ended

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaand that's it for today !
> 
> remember kids, comments feed my soul and muse


End file.
